Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship:
When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
When you smile -- I will know you finally got some.
When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.
When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.
When you are confused -- I will use little words.
When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.
This is my oath..... I pledge it to the end. "Why?" you may ask; "because you are my friend".
Send this to 10 of your closest friends, then get depressed because you can only think of 4.
Remember.......A good friend will help you move..... a REALLY good friend will help you move a body....... let me know if you ever need me to bring a shovel.
Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.