Inprisoned in the depths of my own mind. Stuck here, no escape. I work, come home, sleep. I havent even been playin guitar hero, which i was addicted to. I rarely go out now, but how else can i save money if i keep going out.. pretty soon, my bestfriend will be leaving. she got a new job opportunity in hawaii and who wouldnt jump for that? She asked me to go with, but, i'm not ready to leave home. I have my 5 parakeets, which r like my children. I have my mom, who worries so much, i wouldnt want to leave just 2 keep her from getting sick. There are plans to remodel my house, which i've been excited about for the past 2 years or more.. I also have my highschool best friend who lives in the neighboring city.. she's the sister i never had.. adopted family.. she is only an hour drive away.. Then there's my ex-boyfriend who visits my mom often. i feel bad, cuz he wants to get back together.. on his last visit.. he hugged me so much.. he wouldnt let go before he left... he kissed me.. i feel so bad. ive been so depressed the past 2 weeks, its almost unbearable.. wanting to cry but cant unless i'm alone.. i just feel so trapped..
