Top 10 Reasons For Being American
0. You can have a woman president without electing her.
1. You can spell colour wrong and get away with it.
2. You can call Budweiser beer.
3. You can be a crook and still be president.
4. If you've got enough money you can get elected to do anything.
5. If you can breathe you can get a gun.
6. You get to be really obese.
7. You can invent a new public holiday every year.
8. You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made any nobody seems to care.
9. You get to call everyone you've never met "buddy".
10. You can think you're the greatest nation on earth with condom on.
10a. When you're not.
10b. At all.
