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EmT4LiFe's blog: "tooo funny"

created on 12/11/2006  |  http://fubar.com/tooo-funny/b33402

Men’s Night Out...

Men’s Night Out... A man was approached by a co-worker at lunch who invited him out for beers after work. The man said that his wife would never go for it, that she does not allow him to go drinking with the guys after work. The co-worker suggested a way to overcome that problem: "When you get home tonight, sneak into the house, slide down under the sheets, gently pull down your wife's panties, and give her oral sex. Women love it, and believe me, she'll never mention that you were out late with the boys." So, the man agreed to try it and went out and enjoyed himself. Late that night, he sneaked into the house, slid down under the sheets, gently slid down his wife's panties and gave her oral sex. She moaned and groaned with pleasure, but after a little while, he realized he had to take a leak, so he told her he'd be right back, got out of bed and walked down the hall to the bathroom. When he opened the door and went in, he was very surprised to see his wife sitting on the john. "How did you get in here? he asked. "Shhhhhhhh!!!!! she replied, "you'll wake up my mother!!

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BMW

BMW A lady walks into a BMW dealership. She browses around, spots the Top-of-the-line Beemer and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to feel the fine leather upholstery, she inadvertently breaks Wind. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a sales person doesn't pop up right now. As she turns around, her worst nightmare materializes in the form of a salesman standing right behind her. Cool as a cucumber and displaying complete professionalism, the salesman greets the lady With, "Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?" Very uncomfortably, but hoping that the salesman may just not have been there at the time of her accident, she asks, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?" He answers, "Madam, if you farted just touching it, you are going to sh*t yourself when I tell you the price."

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