I've been thinking.
Alot.
I know I have a propensity of taking everything said to me to heart. Honestly, who doesn't?
I figured that this year would be different...it was for a short while but it reverted back to the same old scheisse. Does it bother me? Of course,I'd be devoid of human emotions if it didn't.
Will I let things get to me? Well,easier said than done. But I'm trying...by gosh ( such strong language for a blog! Hehe)I'm trying.
I've also been doing some soul searching on my past dating experiences. Most(well all) ended up in the dumper. Is it me? Perhaps. Or maybe it's the type of woman I'm pinning for.
What do I want? It's relatively simple really (kinda like me :). A woman who likes good conversation. A woman who stimulates my intellect as well as, yes, my loins (hey I'm a guy...I think). Someone who appreciates me for me. Yes, I'm not a fashion plate, Yes, I'm not the most agreeable person around,Yes I'm moody. But then again...who isn't?
I want someone to talk too. Someone I can laugh with,make them smile, walk hand in hand, Window shop. Someone whom I can txt message during the day, doodle their name endlessly on my desk blotter. Someone I can leave a lil cutesy message on their answering machine. It's not so much to ask for , right?
Apparently it is. For me anyways. I'm terribly shy,super self conscious about my looks, my weight and so on. Not exactly what a woman is looking for. Yea, I can be witty at times..even pithy. But does that suffice?
I don't think so.
Why...glad you asked....
I'm Annelid, the funny guy but when it comes to anything of substance...ie...mustering up enough courage to ask someone out..I hear the following :
1. Your like the brother i never had (crotch punch).
2. I don't want to jeopardize our friendship (classic)
3. I just got out of a relationship. (yea)
4. I don't like you in that sort of way (fair enough).
Duly noted....
I've been told by my friends (male of course) that I'm too nice. Which brings me to my next point...what's "too nice"?That I didn't attempt to make a smooth move on the woman with in 5 minutes of meeting her?
Or that I looked at her face when talking?
Or perhaps I actually listen to what she's saying as opposed to just yes'ing her to death?
They're right...I'm too nice.So be it.
I'm all tuckered out from adding photo's,stash items and the like so I'll end this blog on this one note...
TO BE CONTINUED.