So in cleaning up my computer and deleting old files and pictures (a wonderful trip down memory lane on a peaceful Sunday, I must say), I came across this old conversation. Names edited, of course. But I smirked after I read it and figured I'd share. This is the type of convo I enjoy. Esoteric because we exist on a similar wavelength and don't NEED the extraneous explinations, not because we're trying to be snooty douchers. Make it click like this, if you expect my attention to be kept for very long:
Me: You are always different from you, and always the same. But, internet shit doesn't count.
Him: No, you know me in person. ME. The asshole.
Me: The twitchy contorted hand/face music loving you.
Him: What's different between him and HIM?
Me: You're the same but so am I to the people that matter.
Him: No. You wear sweatpants, and have less than perfect skin, and value knowledge over people. But you make yourself into a sex goddess online. Or others have, and you play along...Hmm...
Me: I have more pictures of me in ugly-faced normality on here. But, you know, people want the other shit.
Him: Yeah. They want Magical Glowing Adjusted Saturation Leah.
Him: What pisses ME off? Neverseeshitohsnapa-thong!-Leah is 50 million times more dope. You have so much more than a pretty face and nice body. Yet on fu, you milk the physical. Is it the instant gratification? Kampai. *drinks* I dunno. I just feel like I lost the Leah I know.
Me: On fubar. Different places, different faces.
Me: Mental escapes - varying degrees of vacation
Him: Oh god, are you that fucked, kid?
Me: I unplug from reality. You know this.
Him: You're schitzo, I'm socio, but fuck. I don't fake it, why do you? Hell, even our conversations change once we hit yahoo. What are you avoiding?
Me: I explained, different faces.
Him: Yeah, but it's ME.
Me: I just have fun on fubar, outside the daily me... and I tell people to please talk to me on yahoo if they want ME.
Him: Fubar is Whore Leah, Myspace is Sexy Leah, Facebook is Leah.
Me: Yep. Varying degrees of removal. Look, they're all me's. But, concentrated indulgences via various outlets.
Him: Oh, I dig.
Me: I think fubar... well, I'm not the only one that uses fubar as such. I'd say... Fubar is 20%. Myspace is 50%. Facebook is 75%. Of me. Even RL Leah isn't 100%. I'm not sure where it all is, but that's a different level altogether.
Him: I've noticed.
Me: She's around. Like I said, on different levels. Some people can play there, most can't. -Different level of reality-
-Random bullshitting cut-
Him: Ironic. In a relationship, you have stronger morals than I. In life, you're a monster compared to me. Better not point any fingers. We're both flawed.
Me: Dead on. But the problem is, I see apathy and "meh" as more monstrous than what I do.
Him: And I think you lead people on, and are a cold heartless bitch. Haha, I love the juxtaposition. We're so similar, yet on opposite polarities.
Me: It's not a line, it's a circle. Polarities exist in the same place.
(quantum physics as relationships rant cut out)
Him: You know what's amusing? I've never had to compare astro/quantum physics with a relationship until YOU showed up. Even more amusing? Only you would catch and understand the reference and difference.
Him: (Every architech is an engineer, every engineer is a physisist. Go figure.) You get my dumbness.
Me: And you deal with all my dualities. Hah, I'll quit the physics talk now, promise.
Him: But I like it.
Me: Dancing on strings. One, two, three...
Him: You have no idea how rare it is that I can speak some esoteric nonsense and SOMEONE gets it.
Me: Like old times. Yeah, rare breeds, indeed.
Him: We really are. It's like the same guy smacked us both in the head as children.
Me: God. Hahaha.
That was an evil cackle you should have heard.
Him: I did.