I am right now going through anxiety issues along with having depression...ALot of people dont seem to understand this unless you yourself have been through it in one shape or form whether you or a loved one has been through it...Right now these issues are taking a huge toll on my life...I have known im having anxiety alot and having panic attacks i recently had a panic attack while walking my children halloween night trick or treating...I was doing pretty good for awhile but then it hit out of the blue and I felt like I couldnt breathe and felt sick...My heart started racing fast and i started to feel warm all over... I felt so overwhelmed I was so scared...I had to sit somewhere and try and calm down...I called my boyfriend but he was still at work out of town so he wouldnt be able to pick me up...So I hung on him not to be mean but i couldnt talk anymore...Then i sat for a bit and after about 10 minutes I was a bit calmer and thank God i wasnt too far from my house...Then I had to tell my daughter we had to get home...So after again I started walking after a few minutes I started to feel a little calmer and made it home...This scared the hell out of me...I felt like I let my kids down...And I have been feeling worthless and not beautiful...I appreciate all who have said Im sexy and beautiful and all but I dont see it in me...I feel like Im a bad mother since I cant do normal everyday activities with my children like taking them to the park or taking a walk uptown...I love my children very dearly they are the most important thing to me...So finally after a few People I know have told me about a place that sends counselors to your home I have called them and am now waiting for them to call me to get my first appointment... I know that this will be a more comfortable setting for me in my own home since if I walk to far i feel like I am going to pass out and start feeling panicky...I thank you for reading this...And I know I can and will get better it will just take some time to figure out what is going on with me...I will let you know what happens after my first appointment...Please keep your fingers crossed that I will get over this as quick as possible because I hate not being able to have real quality time with my children like they need and deserve...
