For those of you that know me already, this will not come as a surprise. For those of you that do not, I guess I am talking to you.
Ever wonder about things you had the opportunity to do and never did? Whether they were dangerous, sexual, high speed, or just plain fun and you felt unmotivated to go? Ever sat down and thought about all the things that, despite whether or not you knew you wouldn't like them, you had to wonder, "What if I did?"
A little history: My father got drunk as hell one night when I was 5 and without warning he beat the hell out of me. It wasn't today's day and age, so nothing came of it, but I was tough and stayed standing. Eventually he tired himself out, and I still had all my teeth. The point is, I'll never forget the last thing he said to me. He said, "I hate you for everything you will one day become." This scared the hell out of me. Not so much his words, but what they represented. They represented a broken man, with so many regrets about things he never did that he couldn't even stand to see someone at the starting line, somewhere he wished he was.
Because of that day, and I kept this my whole life, I have always vowed to move without hesitation into anything that even so much as interested me in the slightest. Some people have fears of heights. Some people are afraid of spiders. Some people even fear clowns. As for me, I have just one fear. I fear that some day I will regret so much the things I didn't do, that I will attempt to damn my own child.
No kids as of yet. Look forward to working on that. However, I began to take the steps that very day to make sure that the situation never happens. In a way, I thank my father for this lesson. He showed me the wrong way, and the only way left is correct. A lot of you ask me how I have done so much by my age, and you know the answer if you didn't already.
I have jumped out of planes with and without a parachute. I trained to be a powerful lover. I raced cars, raced bikes, went bungee jumping, saw the world. I have swung from a branch over a 250 foot drop to the water below. I have climbed mountains, done the world circuit for fighting, and surfed the wing of a jet as it took off. The list goes on.
The wisdom and experience is flawlessly invaluable. A lot of you often call me too old for my age, lol, and that's fine. These days, I have managed to slow it down a lot, in preparation for one more hurdle. The biggest one of all. If I sit back on my porch one day and regret anything, it would be that I never had a family.
Any one of them is scary. The scariest question that I hope I never ask is "What if?" I'll forever be a slave to the avoidance of that question, even if it so much as means meeting someone interesting from this site. Some of you can even testify that it's no lie, lol.
All in all, I ask you all another question: "What is it that you regret, and is it too late to change that?"
