I have a Golden Retriever & I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out.
A woman behind me asked if I had a dog..... On impulse, I told her "Uh No, I am starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't, because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms".
I told her, "It is essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again".
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was waiting in line, behind her.
Horrified, she asked, "Well, if it's an essentially perfect diet, how did you end
up in the hospital?" I said "because I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me".
I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.
