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she stares at the bottle. wondering how many it will take to end it all. a hand full or the whole bottle. should she drink the bottle of rum to make them go down easier. she thinks to herself, " why did it have to be this, way?" Why wasnt her love enough for him? Was there anything she could have done differently? She gave him her heart. Her very soul. But he crushed her. when he walked away. taking everything with him. She forgets to think about her daughter. that is or was her life. before him. Its as if nothing matters anymore. that she doesnt want to feel anything anymore. shes tired of turning her emotions off when it comes to dealing with the pain. this is a pain she has never had to face before. because she had never truly been in love.. or loved. She opens the bottle of pills.. looking at them as they spill on the table in front of her. they are are a pretty chrimson and white. She reaches out to touch them..one here and another. she puts them one by one into her mouth.. she takes a swallow of the rum..and repeats this again.. she starts feeling the burning of alcohol as she swallows.. she lays back.. replaying the last happy time she was in his arms..replaying the night he left..the night he crushed her heart in his hand.. she is now truly alone.. no one will find her for a few days.. nor will anyone care.. she feels the sleep coming on.. waiting.. waiting for it to consume her. waiting for it to make her heart or whats left of it to stop.. waiting to stop breathing..her last thought was I loved him..
