I hate to get woke (woken?) up for any reason. I particularly hate to get woke up for a stupid reason. The following counts as the stupidest reason ever:
We have been having some pretty good rain for a few days. 4:30 am I get startled out of bed by my doorbell ringing which in turn sets my dog to barking. The apartment manager's husband is standing there. Apparently he can't sleep because he hears a drip. The first thing to come to my mind, and thus the first thing out of my mouth is, "No fucking shit, it's raining you asshole." As the stupified look runs across his face, the rest of the thoughts are:
How is this my problem?
Are you planning to wake me up when you hear thunder during a lightening storm too?
It's windy too, do you plan to mention that you can hear it moaning through the eves?
Those however, didn't get a voice because I was busy trying not to kill the idiot. So, knowing he is jewish, I asked, "Did you wake me up to ask God to make the rain stop?"
He finally manages to mumble something about he wanted to make sure it wasn't something leaking in our apartment. Gee, if something is leaking in my apartment, don't you think I'd know it before you do? Isn't that why I turned in a work order 6 months ago when the faucets in the bathroom went bad and wouldn't shut off all the way?
So first thing in the morning (and by first thing I mean 10am), I call the owner and complain. Now the manager is in deep shit. She gets a phone call. She comes up to my apartment to try to change her husband's story of this morning. She tries to tell me that the reason he woke us up was because the drip had turned into a splash. WRONG! First of all, this isn't the first time your idiot, errrr husband, has disturbed us because he can't sleep. Second, if he had meant splash, he would have said splash. Third, if he hears either dripping or splashing or god forbid both during a rain storm, his first thought should be, "(Oh, it's raining" not, "I can't sleep so let's make sure the neighbors can't sleep either."
I believe my reaction of rolling my eyes through her whole explanation and the "Yeah, right, nice fucking try, you lying bitch" pretty much covered my thoughts on the matter.
The sad part is that I know these people have bred twice already. Will the stupidity never end?
