I have a dream that haunts my days
It’s the cold that crawls my spine
It holds me close and makes me shake
So that I fear the fall of night
What can I do, please, what can I do?
When I’m plagued by my subconscious
With no control over the speed I move
Inside my head I feel so nauseas
It’s a battle within but I can’t deal without
The taste of rage that’s in my mouth
Join me and we’ll spit as one
Or don’t, and let me have all the fun
The delirium sets in and makes me free
From everything that I’m supposed to be
And dream about old things again
Unwillingly a victim of my mind’s torment
Again and again my face shows pain
For there is a gun pointed at my face
I’m on my knees begging for my soul
And hoping that I leave this place whole
The man speaks words loud and harsh
Such things would break her heart
If my mom saw what he said
Both of us would have wound up dead
But I’m alone and cowering before the man
Until he says to me: “Show your hands”
Shaking they raise bit by bit by bit
I try to steady but I’m losing grip
He laughs and tells me to put them
Together so I can pray for a friend
Because there will be no one to help
In stopping my descent into hell
But his face, I just cannot see him
Remaining in the shadows keeps him hidden
But he sounds so similar I swore I knew
Knew the face that belonged to who
I pray, and pray but no one comes
And I have no place, nowhere to run
He the gun into my mouth
And lets off the most ferocious sound
A roar from his gut paled me white
That is until he came into the light
If I had my breath I would have screamed
Because looming with the gun was me
I sat for a second in total shock
Until I heard that single shot
My eyes filled with color then suddenly black
As the last thing I heard was a horrible laugh
That’s when I wake up in a sweat and scream
A sound I never heard bellows from me
Feeling so haunted by the other scene
That I can never fall back to sleep
But what is it telling me, warning me?
I just don’t know whatever it means
I know people have dreams where they died
But having them be the sourcing demise?
I have a dream that haunts my life
It’s the shiver you feel up your spine
A dream that pales me white as one
And makes me feel even more alone
