Have you ever let another person’s actions determine who you are? I did this without even realizing it! I have been married for quite a few years and the man I married is not the man I am married to today. All people change over time and married people either grow in the same direction or different directions over time. I think this is what happened to us.
Neither of us are bad people we just aren’t compatible anymore. We have different priorities and outlooks on life. He sees things very differently than I do. I am not saying he is completely wrong and I am completely right, but knowing the details of our marriage I can tell you a divorce is inevitable.
I was always a quiet shy person. I never spoke out of turn and I was pretty naive. After 18 years with this man I am none of these things anymore. I have turned into a controlling bitch (for lack of a better term). I have been forced by circumstances to be this way. While I am glad I am no longer too shy to stand up for myself I in no means want to be a controlling bitch! So I will stick with being a strong, independent woman that knows what she wants.
I have been fortunate enough to find a wonderful friend that was nice enough to be brutally honest with me. He is a great person with a kind heart. He has made me see that I do not have to put up with be taken for granted or being taken advantage of. He has made me realize that you can be a strong woman and still be a gentle person without giving up your identity. With his kindness I have been able to see that I am a person worthy of happiness and security in life.
So, if you are reading this “friend”, I want to thank you for enabling me to be the person I really am – someone that can be loving, caring, sharing, considerate, happy, while still being a strong person.
