Shall a spare a small moment to write, dear readers?
To sneak in a moment of stolen passion with you?
Besides myself and Emma, everyone else in the household lie abed.
Snoring, huffing and...coughing.
I sip from my searing rainbow cup and glance now and then behind me. This is a stolen moment....with you.
Even as I type, I sigh. I hear Shane coming down the hall, coughing all the while.
He will wake up at least one person and that chain will continue, until I am busy once more.
I sigh. And then immediately feel guilty about it.
I feel badly, he is sick.
Has been all week. But I need my time. I need it badly.
Yesterday I went in for an eye exam. When they called me into the backroom and asked me to sit down I looked at the Lady with concern.
"Are you ganna poof my eyeball?"
She smiled...and nodded "Yes."
"Pleeeeeeease don't POOF my eyeball!!! I'm allergic to it!"
She smiled once more "It's just air."
"Oh...I mean...it really, really freaks me out!" I chewed on my lip and tried to beg with my eyes...which doesn't work so well with straight women.
"It's better then the alternative." She mumbled as she positioned the huge honking machine at my chin level. "Please sit forward and place your chin ..there."
I stared at her "What's the alternative?"
Maybe it was better. Perhaps it was something so UNPOOFY, that it would make me happy.
She shrugged "Back in the day we would put numbing drops in the patients eyes, and then use a metal stick to test your eyeball."
I leaned forward at once, placed my chin in the holder and stated "Poof away...what's taking you so long?"
Just for the record. I hated it.
I jumped, screamed and was done in 5 second.
"Now go get Shane..." she told me... "But don't scare him!" She called after me.
Damn it. The Poof lady has spoken.
A few minutes later Shane walked out, his eyes skinnied, his lips pursed.
"I hate that."
"I know!" And we held each other.
The bad thing was...I need glasses. Which I knew already. My Bells palsy has taken a toll on my left eye.
I was so concerned, I thought I was going blind in that eye.
When the doctor came into the room and slipped a honking metal machine over my nose and asked which slide was better "1...or 2.., 2...or 3..,.3...or 4..."
and like magic...whalla! I could SEE in my left eye!
I wanted to rip the machine away from my face and kneel before him. I wanted to tattoo his name across my ass and start a new religion in his name.
I was cured!
I was fixed!
I was almost BLIND and he fixed me!
My heart pounded with happiness.
After the exam I asked him, my voice dripping with gratitude..."It was horrible huh? i can't see out of that eye."
"Actually it wasn't so bad. Both of your eyes are healthy. You can wear the glasses at your discretion."
Really?" my mouth dropped open
"Yes really. With a corrective lens you will be 20/20 again in Both eyes."
"Oh." I thought, and then smiled and excused myself to go and see Daphene, the frame lady.
I'm a drama queen, so naturally I was disapointed that I wasn't making the papers for the most amazing person ever to have to deal with one fucked up eyeball.
I really thought that Dr. Guarcillo would call friggen Ripleys...or something.
Huh...I'm normal....go figure.
Shane had his exam and we picked out our frames. I knew the ones I wanted. They are red and Vera Wangish.
Shanes remind me of buddy holly a little bit.
They were expensive.
Whatever...I'll be normal in cute stunna shades.
