Asylum's blog: "Story time"

Sometimes happiness hurts the most, I blame it on all the monsters in my head

Forgetting everything trying make the night and darkness fade away. Today I feel like I didn’t push enough

Wishing it would just all go away.  Picking up the pieces of your shattered happiness, your heart.

Finding a thin line of chaos and honorable mentions. I can’t pick up my thoughts or emotions

I don’t need another, a place to put everything back together fearing the worst. Here I go, taping and stitching up broke glass

Stabbing my fingers among the jagged edges take them as currency. I’ll just keep doing what I always do, writing words letting them speak to you

Hoping they reach you, seeking what truly matters. Wiping tears away, being blank waiting….. and waiting

Time to forget, doubt and move on.

Lost in a thought of uncertainty and persuasions. Blind to a world that isn't your own. A world that is unclear to ones emotions. Counterfeiting the loneliness of a desire to know the feeling of being wanted not denied in thoughts of goodness. A position of wish is sought to be a realization.

Pinned against the walls of solitary confinement pondering the thoughts that have been dorment for many years. Why now why ever do the thought emerge? Make this straight jacket tighter before I break free from it losing control of emotions.  Keep me pinned to the wall before I hurt myself. Give me a syditive to calm my nerves do not allow me to speak a word of my inner pain sew my mouth shut and tape it. I dont need to hear my own suffering cover my ears so i hear no evil to be done.

Free is as free can be.

what does it take to be truly free?

Is it like taking of your clothes and running around naked?

Oh what would it be like to be free of desperation.

Shall I ever truly feel free? Do I truly feel Free?

It is time to let go of this deperation. to be free.

Now free of desperation. Where to go? What to do?

Shall i just be free and not worry on how to be free?

I am FREE!

    Never judge a day by the weather
    The best things in life aren't things
    Tell the truth - there's less to remember
    Speak softly and wear a loud shirt
    Goals are deceptive - the unaimed arrow never misses
    He who dies with the most toys - still dies
    Age is relative - when you're over the hill, you pick up speed
    There are two ways to be rich - make more or desire less
    Beauty is internal - looks mean nothing
    No Rain - No Rainbows

Running through the stark white halls of the Asylum, the sickly sweet scent of blood clanged to the air. Stumbling across the blood-splattered door jams while hearing the sorrowful screams of pain and agony. Upon entering the corridor, droplets of blood scattered on the white tiled floors. As we played through-out the hallways slipping and sliding amongst the bloody floors falling to the ground becoming covered in blood from head to toe. Upon getting up from our bloody slip-n-slide, we turn our attention to a door down another hallway. Looking upon the door on a closer inspection the door appeared to be moving in a wave like motion.  Peering at one another trying to decide if we should touch the door or open it to find out what is going to appear on the other side. Finally a choice comes up with an approving answer with our minds. We opened the door widely taking a glance we come to find that it led us to an unknown place that doesn’t even seem natural. Before us is a world of nothing but death. In the distance we see mountains covered in flesh and bone as if it were snow, fields upon fields of dead grass hiding bones amongst it, rivers of blood, and so much more to be seen. The Sky was dark as can be no light nothing just the blackness.Looking at one another they say

"I don't think we are supposed to be here we better go back to the asylum now."

Turning back towards where the door once stood now is gone into the abyss. Standing in the darkness whispers of voices start to become more apparent to our hearing. Not being able to make out what they are saying one of us had asked

"Why are we stuck here? What did we do to be stuck here?"

The whispers came again in a language that has never been heard or documented anywhere. Looking up into the darkest sky we have ever seen from where we were just played in the asylum being able to see a moon, stars, and hearing the unknown whispers. Beginning to run away from the whispers hoping they will fade away into the emptiness around, but in every direction they ran the whispers become louder and louder becoming so loud they could not hear the stomping of their own feet on the ground. As they continued to around the bone fields crushing skulls, cracking limbs they came upon other various bones that appeared to be human remain, and yet they were not totally sure if it really was or not. Beginning to question where we were again. As we analyze our own questions over and over again a human shaped figure begins to approach us the question are being answered.

"You are here for a reason... that reason is to survive the fear of the unknown."

The figure replies.

"You are also here do to your own ignorance to fail to realize all that blood you both were playing around in belonged to you."

The two begin to look at each other whispering softly.

“Do you really think that this thing it’s telling use the actual truth that we are dead?”

“No I think that he is completely lying to us because we have to be just sleeping or something.”

Suddenly there was dead silence not a single whisper sound of bones cracking or crushing could be heard throughout the realm. We turned back towards where the human shaped figure had once been, but there was nothing in sight just to foot prints where it had stood.

“We should find some kind of shelter if we are really going to be stuck out here because we really have no idea of what can possibly happen.”

“Yea you are probably right that would be really smart of us.”

The two began to walk towards the forest they had seen when they first came to the unknown realm. Getting closer and closer to the forest they realized that the forest was more bloody and gloomy than the field of skulls, bones and flesh. The forest bark was very unusual to them indeed because it appeared to be as if it were moving like giving off a beat similar to a heart. One of them reaches for the tree to feel it and find out why it beating as if it was a heart. Placing their hands on the tree, their fingers curled to its contour as to find a good sense for it. As the tree pulsated against their hands they hesitate and pull away from it. The fact the tree was beating similar to a heart freaked them out. Their first instinct was to run either further into the blood stained beating forest or away back into the horrid field.

“What the hell do we do? Those trees are really starting to freak me out with how they are just beating.”

“I know how you feel. How the hell can a tree beat like our hearts?”

They paused in silence as they tried to think it over. A pounding sensation from the trees began to desecrate through their ears resonating into their skulls making it feel as they had a vibrating sensation. After a few minutes the desecrating sound was slowly disappearing from their skulls. Peering into the darkness of the sky in the distance there was the visual signs of a violent thunderstorm brewing up.

“Um if that storm is heading this way we better find shelter fast.”

“Yeah I would have to agree with you because that storm does not look to friendly.”

The flashes of lightening filled the entire region with its dark colors of red and gold. As the lighting filed the air so did the boisterous crash of thunder. The thunder was so loud the ground beneath would shake. Before two of them even realized it was a bit too late the violent storm they had seen in the distance was no directly over them. The lightening now was even brighter than it was before; in fact it was more blinding now. The sound of thunder was also more intense it became so loud you could not even hear each other talk. As the thunderstorm became extremely violent the two of them stumbled upon what appeared to be a shack of some short. Opening the door slowly to make sure the shack type thing was clear of creatures or anything that could result in death; they entered and saw nothing.

“We finally have shelter now. I was beginning to think we would never would.”

“No kidding I was thinking we were going to be stuck in that hellish thunderstorm.”

“Wait a minute. There is something odd bout this shack.”“What do you mean by that?”

“Well out there in that thunderstorm I couldn’t hear a single word you said until now.”

“You’re right I couldn’t even hear myself think.”

As they pounder why it was they can hear each other inside the shack but not outside. They began to search around the shack to find out what was keeping out all the sounds of that hellish thunderstorm was just padding stapled to the walls. Looking closer at the padding on the walls it really wasn’t padding at all it really was layers of flesh. The flesh padding didn’t have a foul aroma that of a usual rotting corpse it was more inviting. As they peered out the windows of the shack they had noticed it had started to rain, but this rain was no ordinary rain it had the color and contrast that resembled blood as if was just dripping out of a body…

Do I cry now or do I cry later? Does it even matter if I really cry? Tears are worthless pieces of shit made of water and salt. Tears feel like grains of salt just entwined with water skimming across your skin.  Reaching up to wipe it away your skin begins to prey away from your flesh and bone.  Instead of tears there is blood now were the tears have once been feeling more natural.  Now if only they were just bloody tears and not salt water you would understand what is truly meant to be.  Look at me now should I just fall apart and just be one big bloody ass mess or should I just pull myself out of this whole and fuck all. You tell me which is better or shall I just show you myself because it may not ever be pretty again.

Close your eyes everything will be ok. Look into your heart and see that you’re everything that you care about and love is more valuable to you then you may realize. Keep in mind that you already have them and won them over there is turning back now. Stop! Feel your heart burns with desire and wants to bond with another heart don’t let it get away now you know you can do it. Wait! And feel your heart s become one as you hold each other close and tell each other you love one another. Kiss already you know you want to do it don’t hesitate. Wrap your arms around each other pull closer don’t fear not to let go when you must know in your heart you bond is complete and never going away. Step back take a breath know what you feel and love more than life, more than the world, and more than anything. Don’t let me go! Hold me tight never let me have the fear of loneliness again. You are now my beating heart lock yourself in my chest and throw away the key I’m keeping you forever.

life is a near game to many people, a game that can not be reset for anyone, some may be just tryin to win life over another, we may think we have extra lives we don't, we only contain one life, it is up use who face reality that know we are the one who must play to mae a difference of what has became all that we know, so now live your life and suffer for what we most do to advance