I'll admit that for many years I wrote off the idea of "tantric sex" as New Age nonsense or an excuse for those who practiced it to have group sex with each other. But in recent years, I began researching Tantra and I learned that I was quite wrong. Tantra, it turns out, helps couples with difficulty reaching orgasm, premature ejaculation, and reconnecting in a deep sexual way. Whether you are struggling with sexual dysfunction or you just have a case of sexual blahs, Tantra can help.
Tantric sex helps men and women blend their different sexual energies. According to Tantra, women's sexual energy originates in the heart and, if all goes well, pours down to her genitals. Men's sexual energy originates in the genitals and then (sometimes) moves up to the heart. The best sex happens when both people are stoking their energy in both places. That's where the work comes in-it's part emotional, part physical and part spiritual.
Breathing and eye contact lay the groundwork. You and your partner practice deep, conscious breathing to feel your own bodies. Then you breathe and use eye contact to sync into each other. After connecting with your breath and eyes, you move onto specific exercises for the body.
Men give women a long, kneading full-body massage, then awaken the genitals with a G-spot massage. (Sounds good, right?). Women help men bridge the mind-body connection during sex, so they're more in tune with their arousal. Men also learn Kegel exercises to recognize their point-of-no-return and allow the sexual experience to continue. The upshot is waves of near-orgasmic bliss for him and one (or more) orgasms for you.
Ultimately, the essence of Tantric sex is instructive for any couple. It teaches you to strip away the fears, regrets and boundaries that hold you back from your most intense and satisfying erotic connection.
Who said working on your relationship couldn't be fun?
