I have always belived that " Everything happens for a reason"
Lately tho.... things havent been so clear:
Things have been pretty ruff for me these past two years......
When I graduated College in 2000, I was SURE I wanted to be a social worker for children..... So when I got a job doing just that, I thot my " Lifes work" had begun...
4 1/2 years later and totally exhasted and jaded by the system that " protects" our children, I found myself not knowing what i wanted in life....
Got a job in HR... was fired.... Got a job in sales... Quit... Got a job as a temp for a customer service position.. Quit.. Got another job in HR working for the biggest freak I've ever known...(and THATS saying something)... and the contract was pulled for no reason after two weeks...
Two years of New types of jobs....being a Nanny... doing Customer service for $11 an hour....Sales for a bunch of mafia guys that was almost purely commission only....HR jobs for ppl that were in need of mental health services.....
I made mistakes.... ALLOT.... and I paid for them.... and when i thot i learned my lesson...I found that i couldnt get a job.. or keep a job...
They say everything happens for a reason.. but i dont know WHY I had to suffer with 4 months unemployed.... scrounging for rent.. having to ask my family for money at 32 years old... like a loser and failure... feeling like that as well...
They say " When it rains it pours".... and I see that pattern..... Couldnt get hired to save my life... THEN.... I got some staffing agencys to help me... and the offers came pouring in..
But with all the disspaointments... thinking i had a job... then losing it.... and everything else in my life.... It wa shard to choos ewhich one would be ebst for me... and sometimes it got to apoint i should take the first one that came along so i could keep a roof over me and my husbands head( and yes folks... he works too,, so dont ask that)
Corey workes two jobs inorder to keep us alive... and he has been a BLESSING thru this....
But My ego has been brusied....my soul and faith in the universe beaten and battered....
I was recently offered a chance to work for my alma mater.... in a job that seems realitivly easy and something i could be REALLY good at...pays well....and seems to be almost a "
Dream JOb"..... so of course i'm waiting for bottem to fall thru....
But if It doesnt..... And I've finnally found THE JOB...WHY did i have to wait so long... what type of lesson was i supposed to learn AFTER I learned the ones i felt i needed to?..... Did i deserve that type of ego hit and suffering?
" Everything Happens for a Reason"......
HMMMMMMMM... Guess we'll see
