Sis Blog by loopyass
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loopyass's blog: "Sis"

created on 05/22/2008  |
Today i came home exhausted from boredom. see i had to wait at Paint and body shop while my wife haggled out the task of getting our rental car this morning. So while waiting , I was watching Wimbledon and basically getting aggravted at the wait. By the time my wife came i was sleppy and tired. So when we finally got home after a couple of stops at stores. I laid down on couch and just went out. Boy, am i glad I did. I had this incredible dream where i was talking with my sister. It was just like we always did driving and talking and laughing. I cant remember the conversation but I do remeber the feeling of love i felt. When i woke up it seeemed so real like it actually happened. What ever doesnt matter to me. The fact that i had this was my gift for today. It was like being given one last chance to just enjoy my sister and the one on one time we used to spend together. Its amazing though, even though i cant remember the conversation, i can still see her smile and hear her laughter. Yet more than anything it was that feeling of love i felt when me and her always spent time together. I guess that will always be her legacy to me. Now whats incridble is the timing of this dream. Lately I;ve been going through some pretty intense feelings about family matters concerning my sister's family and our own. So when I woke up and thought about it, it was lke she was telling me she was watching and apprecaited what i stood for. So even in death , it seems we are connected and that will carry me through these times where i will always miss my laughing bubby. If i could i would go back to sleep now , if I thought I could spend just a little more time with her, So if you have siblings or friends , loved ones, take the time to enjoy them now. For one day all that you will have of them will be memories and dreams. An hey im sure as hell am not complaing about that.
Recently my sister passed on. It came as a sudden shock to all of us. I have not really processed yet and each day that goes by I realize how much she influenced my life. She will always remain one of my greatest gifts in life. I wish u all had a chance to know her. She embodied the best charcteristics all of us aspire to achieve. More than anything though, she taught me the meaning of love. Ill forever be in her debt for this gift. It was never anything she conciously tried to achieve, it was just her gift. Though i will miss her greatly, I find it hard to stay in grief. She had such a positive influence on my life, and taught me that any situation we could find humor and laughter. Ill forever miss her laughter and big smiles , her light touches which were always given at just the right time. Her honesty to be able to give you a kick in the ass if needed. Though that was so rare with her. Her answer to everything in life was LOVE. If i could write a song i would, a poem would be nice. Yet i think the only thing that would suffice, is for me to choose this same path. I would be reminese if I did not say my sister was a Christian who showed my what God has in store for all of us. To love those we come in contact with and to desire to serve rather than be served. So to you my sis, happy journey! I hope when my time comes it will be you that lead me to my journey and sure you will greet me with a smile. And i cant wait to see the true inner beauty that was always inside you. Your legacy will always remain with the ppl you have touched in this life. For no one who you knew was ever the same, your life touched us all in miracalous ways. I Love You.
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