It's all about having FAITH!
Faith--per Mr. Webster (the dictionary) it is defined as:
1) Allegiance to duty or a person
2a) Belief and trust in and loyalty to God
2b) Firm belief in something from which there is no proof
2c) Complete trust
3) Something that is believed especially with strong conviction
Well....anyone who knows me and my life right now, knows that things have been slightly turned upside down in the past few weeks. My best friend Misty has had cancer and is still dealing with it. After lots of treatment, the cancer isn't going away, the damn demon is staying with us. Now, me being a Christian, I KNOW that God does take care of us--no doubt about it. But I have to say, that my faith has been shaken. I'm alittle angry at how or WHY God can do this to a woman--MY best friend, a mom of 3 kids, a wife and a believer. I'm angry, because I can't figure out HOW to get her thru this. After almost 14 years of a spectactular friendship, I couldn't ask for a better person to have blessed my life. There is an immense amount of love that rolls out of this woman on a daily basis to me. I feed off of her. I need that unconditional love that she shows me. But right now, I know that she is running really low on love, trust, hope and most of all, FAITH. It is a MUST with this sort of battle she is fighting. So, I've sent up several million prayers to God, along with requesting all of my friends to pray for her and the strength that she needs to just make it thru one day at a time. I know that with God working on her, it is possible for her to make it thru this and she has to, there is NO other choice. So I know that I have all of the faith in Misty that I could ever need. (Misty if you are reading this--FIGHT-FIGHT-FIGHT! I'm here to be your cheerleader and your strength).
So right now, I'm reflecting on my past year personally and OMG, it's really scary the amount of things that have happened in my life. There have been SO many ups and downs in 2006. It will actually be very welcomed to close the door on it and just start a great new 2007. I usually make New Year's resolutions, but this year, I decided NOT to. Why? They are a let down. If I need to change something in my life, it should be done right then and there, no waiting. I'm ready to let the blessings flow into my life, just like they have in the past few months. God has kept me in a path that He wants me on. Yes, I've gotten off that path several times and the strangest thing, I could tell it was all wrong, but like a typical person, I had to find it out myself. I feel mentally, physically and spiritually filled up right now. And to be able to walk into the new year with that feeling is GREAT! I'm blessed with 2 beautiful children, several of the greatest friends I could EVER EVER hope for, wonderful family that somehow manages to muster up enough strength in me to support my every move and with a man in my life that has made me see life the way I should be--nothing is impossible if you just pray about it and have FAITH.
I ran across this quote:
"He who has a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how'."
- Friedrich Nietzsche
Now....this really made me stop and think about its meaning and it is SO true. I know I have a purpose on this earth. I know that God put the people in my life for a reason--even though I don't totally understand the HOW of things happening and maybe that is best, maybe its not meant for me to know what His plan is till it is already happening. I can't change what He has laid out for me or anyone else, and I finally see it and I'm not going to try to change it. I want to live my life to the fullest and love like all get out and laugh until I have a room full of laughter with me! That is by far the most important things for me in my life.
Very carefully place on my lower back, I have a tattoo--its a set of butterfly wings, with a set of footprints in the middle of it. There is only one other tattoo like this in the world, and that is very carefully placed on the lower back of Misty. This is something that we share. Its been a very big symbol of what we have as friends and when it is our time to go, we will still have a symbol of a friendship that lasted thru more than you can even imagine! I know that she is struggling, and I'll be the one to carry her through the rest of her time on this earth if that is what I need to do and if that is what God needs me to do. For any of you people who actually read this, here is what the Footprints in the Sand poem is. This is what our tattoo is based off of.
In closing, after alot of my great babble, I hope each of you have a wonderful end of 2006. Lets go into 2007 with a whole new outlook on life, have LOTS of faith and faith that God can and WILL get us thru whatever!
Footprints in the Sand
One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord. Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand. Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, other times there was one only.
This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat, I could see only one set of footprints, so I said to the Lord,
"You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there has only been one set of footprints in the sand. Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?"
The Lord replied, "The years when you have seen only one set of footprints, my child, is when I carried you."
