You sell your home heating system
at a yard sale.
Your husband jokes that instead of buying
a wood stove, he is using you
to heat the family room this winter -
Rather than just saying you are not
amused, you shoot him.
You have to write post-it
notes with your kids' names on them.
The Phenobarbital dose that wiped out
the Heaven's Gate Cult gives you
four hours of decent rest.
You change your underwear
after every sneeze.
You're on so much estrogen that you
take your Brownie troop on a field
trip to Chippendale's.
Leave the Brownie's at home!!!!!
