Frayed Knot FM2 DRK's blog: "Nothing More than Feelings"

So I have had a couple nights of little to no sleep. With many thoughts clawing at the back of my head. A few shed tears. My feelings...silly damn things...are so easily hurt. I have something to say. It may require a moment of your time to read, but that moment is worth it, I believe. I have never set out to intentionally harm anyone. I have never deliberately stolen the affection of anyone from another. I have not willingly seduced another to my bed, who did not ask to be invited. Or belonged to someone else. I have loved and loved deeply, a total of 4 men in my lifetime. I have lusted more than my share. Not that anyone has a limit you know...but my point is this, I am not after anything that belongs to anyone. I am incorrigible..I am flirtatious...I am impetuous...I am kind, gentle, and caring. I am sensitive and extremely passionate. I have issues, most odd...in an OCD type of way...others very personal. I don't betray confidences...as I fully expect my confidences be kept by whomever I choose to share them with. I am very mindful of others feelings as well...because I myself have them and don't appreciate them being stepped upon. What I have realised is that the person I am matters very little to some that I think the most of. Some believe me to be capable of maliciousness and of being underhanded , or scheming. That really stings actually. I have considered the possibility that I am the easiest target for rage, as I am extremely forgiving. This might be something that is known...or evident. I also consider it could be that I don't make my intentions known. Could be anything really...but what I feel is that those who should know me best are the ones thinking the very worst of me. I come here to laugh. Here where it is absolutely acceptable to be myself. No boundaries no rules...the freedom to express myself as a woman and an adult. To defy convention and say..."haha kiss my ass!" The person I am...cannot seperate feelings because its an internet based friendship. The person I am doesn't like worrying that having laughter and fun conversation has to be limited to those who aren't involved in some sort of emotional entanglement. I am who I am..and I am not willing to change my behavior in order to please those around me. I don't care to be accepted for who I am not!!!! Accept me for who I am, as you should if you consider yourself my friend. If you feel as though you can't approach me with any issue you might have with me, then perhaps the issue is within your own mind, or heart. You don't have to love me or even like me, but you are expected to be as honest wth me as I am with you. If that's too much for you...then let's part ways.