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What are you waiting for?

She is everything to me,  The unrequited dream,  A song that no one sings,  The unattainable, she's a myth that I have to believe in.  All I need to make it real is one more reason.  I don't know what to do, I don't know what to do when she makes me sad.

The she I hear is me. The preception of me I project into this virtual world. I have a difficult time keeping up with her. She's a bit fumiscuous. When I get scared or worried they may bleed into my physical world I push them away. I am very sorry for that, some of the people I am talking about in said statement, who might also read this. I am sorry I push you away. I am currently scared in my physical life. I have things that make me really sick. I wish so desprately for a hug that I forget to tell you I may need a hug. I don't want have to ask. 

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