"Don't be scared" he tells me.
Then he tells me he is at the hospital with chest pains. The man I love the man I spent more then thirty years searching for was in the hospital...and he tells me "don't be scared". I was scared I began to panic, I thought all the worst possible thoughts. I thought he was having a heart attack. I thought I would never see him again. I was very scared. I paced the floor what was I to do. I had to go to him, and I did. I walked into the ER of a not so local hospital on Wednesday morning...I didn't leave until Saturday evening( ok I left for an hour on thursday to get some clean clothes and my medications.) I stayed at his bed side frightened that I would lose him and too frightened to let it show how frightened I really was. On Saturday morning a small amount of relief came when we found out it wasn't his heart. But then the fears crept in...if not his heart then what. What is making this wonderful man suffer in this pain. What could be causing him all this discomfort. I wanted to know...I needed to know. I want to know how to help him. Finally on Wednesday morning a solid week from the start of this ordeal we get an answer. Heitel Hernia. So now it begins...the treatment the surgery, all of it...it has been a scary week and now with only this one answer I am still afraid.
