Ravens witch's blog: "Roadwitch"

Image - copyright 1998 Lo Scarabeo S.r.l. The Nine of Wands card suggests that my power today lies in remarkable gratitude. I am not a victim. There are no lost causes. "I've been there, done that, and know suffering -- but it's all good." I'm still standing. "Can't touch this." Self-pity is an excuse to do nothing. To appeal to sympathy for pity's sake is to seek affirmation of the choice to do nothing. I am empowered by the spirit and support of meaningful experience and I transform with silent resilience.

Beautiful Heart written 6/1/2005 3 pm By Debra She's very fat and kind of plain Blending in, a no name jane People snicker and they laugh Calling her ugly and piggy fat They are beautiful people indeed On others self esteem they feed she used to cry wanting to die They didn't see the person inside If they looked closer they would see How beautiful this woman could be Every remark cut deep like a knife Leaving scars all over her life They smashed her heart all to hell In ways she could never ever tell And yet she did not hate them at all No matter how they made her bawl She wanted acceptance thats all she asked Her hurt and tears were hid and masked She was way more beautiful than they could be Blinded by her pain she just couldnt see The glow from inside her and the love she had Shined thru her soul no matter how sad It was a brightness that set her apart For they didnt have her beautiful heart

Complete Surrender 7/2/04 1:00 am Debra For many years I stubbornly fought loosing my Identity for which i sought. Thinking by giving my all to one man would take away my purpose and my plan. Relationship after relationship it remained the same, ending in hurt and placing blame. Then one day you took me by surprise and showed me the answer before my eyes. By completely surrendering my all to you I discovered the things i never knew. When surrendering my all we became as one It didnt mean my own life and person was done. I brought into you all the things that I am Inhancing the qualities you have as a man In return you made me part of what you are And my life became richer n fuller by far We entwine so completely as lover n friend I'ts hard to say where you begin and I end I would not take back anything I've given you And my love and devotion stays tried n true In surrendering to you completely all of me I've discoverd the answer to being set free I give to you willing my heart and my soul Your the other half that makes me whole I did'nt loose myself as i feared it would be Instead being part of you has completed me

Missing You I lay here alone in the dark moving restlessly missing you no warmth in the cold sheets do i encounter when i move no sighs do i hear or light snores sounding much like purrs of a contented giant cat curled up sleeping soundly at night my body aches for your touch the feel of our legs tangled and your hands caressing me softly my head resting against your chest and breathing your male scent. making myself crazy with want of you knowing i cant sate this need to have you, to feel you in me and against me...loving me in every way sitting up with the light on now feeling the long lonely night move slowly towards another dawn into another day of missing you 9/7/04 2 am written by Debra

Deep Scars written 10/6/04 5 pm by debra You hid it well the scars you left Each bruise and mark made Hidden well beneath my clothes Tormenting me, making me afraid You played it out so perfectly The loyal and true spouse Before our friends and family Masking the chaos in our house Each cut you made on my skin And each scar you left in my mind Branding me in a perverse act Every way that you could find The burns and the beatings so cruel So much physical and mental pain Hanging my head down low I thought it my fault, I was to blame I covered for you out of love Thinking that would change it all Until I realized you were sick And saving you was not my call For years I blamed you for what you done Until I found the answer inside of me If I stayed I had no one to blame It was time to set myself free No more torture, no more pain Thats visable for anyone to see But in my mind it still remains So am I actually totally free? You will own me after all is done If I dont release the memories Again, I am the only one Who can ever save me

They were cemented by delusion Each brick of deceit and pain Securing me from loves intrusion It was the wall to my domain Silent with my secrets i sat Not answering hope's knock Fear nibbled in me like a rat Inside my self made cell block Many tried to climb and penetrate The exterior of my lonely wall In fear,i would only retaliate One by one they'd tumble and fall I didnt see the gradual crumbling Around each brick of pain Or the ray of light that it did bring Inside my cold and lonely domain When i realized, it was too late You had already gotten inside My destiny sealed by this fate I had no place to run and hide Then i noticed the warmth you made Inside my once lonely domain I found that i was no longer afraid Your love removed all bricks of pain The light you brought shines bright And warm breezes caress my being My heart takes wings in flight Free with this new found feeling .......of love RavensWitch © By RavensWitch On 6/20/2005 10:09:25 AM

Memories Of You You take the very life from me With each tear i shed The cuts in my heart bleed Sinking to my feet like lead Always was forever until the end And love knew no bounds Promises to always be my friend Are now but distant sounds Trust? doubt? fears run rampantly one right into another one Happiness keeps distantly Moving from me till there is none My fault or was it yours? hers? Doesnt really matter at all now Self blame covers me like many furs Their heaviness making me bow My soul bared wounds wide open The pain for everyone to see My love for you a vast ocean And the hurt i feel an endless sea There are no answers wrong or right For they escape my searching grasp Running from me into the dark night Sleep eludes me as time does lapse Permanantly etched on my heart Colored by love and memories That will always be a part thats kept hidden inside of me. RavensWitch © By RavensWitch On 6/18/2005 1:28:12 PM

My GrandBabies We were blessed with your presence for awhile Brightening our days and making us smile One beautiful baby girl and handsome baby boy Brought to our world such happiness and joy You'll always be loved and remain in our heart Even though we are heaven and earth apart You'll never know heartache, prejudice or pain And all that comes from the world thats insane You did feel the love in your momma's arms, The safety they gave you from all sorts of harms I grieve for you selfishly as i wanted you here To lavish you with my love and hold you near But it was not meant to be me watching you grow I already miss you both and dearly love you so Someday we'll be together both of you and I And we will walk together hand in hand on the other side...love grandma Debra Sue Winter Copyright ©2008 Debra Sue Winter

Loosing You Twisting and turning My gutt a deep yearnig Unsaitable hunger for The one that i adore My heart deeply aches As if it will break Tears run down my face In pain i cant erase Engulfed in my sorrow For no more tomarrows Are in our future now They slipped away somehow Lost love, gone forever Going on i try to endevor All there is that remains Of a mind gone insane From loosing you. Debra Sue Winter Copyright ©2008 Debra Sue Winter

When you come to my house i serve you. When you visit me i serve you first. i offer you refreshments and food. Want a bite? You get first bite! Thirsty? You get the first glass! Momma always taught good manners. Company and others first. Be unselfish and give your best. Be happy to serve and do your best. Always ask "please" Always say "thank you" Are you tired? Do you need rest? Take my bed i'll use the floor. Because my bed is most comfortable. We are taught to serve and give early. So if this is good manners Would that mean "not to serve" Would be "Bad Manners"? There was a time when people were proud to serve others. Now it becomes "wrong" Everyone has a chip on their shoulder. Giving in and giving out is weak. I maintain that Momma taught right. There is strength and pride in giving There is a beauty and grace in serving. Please come in and have a drink. Set in my best chair and have some cake. i am honored by your presence. When you leave "please come again" ....In my folk's favorite words: "Y'all come back now y'hear???" hehehehe