Traveling down yet another country road. Funny how I always end up on one. Two lanes of blacktop. Usually a few pot holes. The lines hardly visible.
I was wandering this day. Just driving around by myself. My family was in the city “shopping” and I had made an excuse to get away for awhile. As I drove, I was struck by how things had changed yet were the same. It had been years since I’d been here. Since 1976? Thirty years? Had it really been that long? Yeah it had. Just out of High School, feeling immortal, I had moved to South Georgia to live with my Dad.
It had been like stepping back in time. Everyone drove up and down the main drag (Shotwell Street) on Friday and Saturday nights. Maybe take in the Drive In. Try to buy beer. That was my endless summer. 1976.
As I drove it occurred to me where I was. Out close to El Dorendo. Not a town just a wide spot in the road. I smiled. Barbara. I laughed. Of course. She lived close to here then. I had met her on one of those hot Saturday nights that summer. Blond hair, blue eyes, and country. I had come from the “big city” and she was looking to get out of the “country”. Her father raised hogs and she worked on the farm. Strong yet soft and pretty. She took my breath away the first time I saw her. Even though I was shy, I asked her out. I did it before I knew it. I then understood the meaning of smitten. I loved her from that moment, and as I drove on I realized I still did. Not in the same sense that I love my wife and kids. Perhaps just in love with the memory.
After a couple of dates she told me she had joined the Army and was leaving at the end of the summer. She had to get away. Nothing for her here. She hated the farm and the Army was her only way out. I told her I understood. Told myself a thousand times not to fall in love with her, but I did anyway.
We were inseparable that summer. Together as much as possible. I could sit and just stare at her for hours. We shared our lives with each other. Eventually we shared our bodies as well. The first time for both of us. It was awkward and a bit scary. But it was wonderful too. We trusted each other with our deepest secrets.
Eventually the day came. It always seems to. Off she went. Training in Texas. She was to be stationed in Valdosta eventually, but we both realized it was over. We had fallen in love despite ourselves. I saw her a few more times of course. We tried to make it work. Finally it ended in a tearful, quiet, and mutual agreement.
I was in mourning. I lost 50 pounds. Dropped out of college. I was a mess. I had to get away I realized one day. Away from that place and all the memories. I joined the Army shortly after, and away I went also. Wounded in my heart. I’ve never seen her again. Not in all these years. But I remember this road out to El Dorendo. She lived near here. A little farther down I thought.
