Well my relationship of 11 yrs is finally coming to an end. I am tired of the lies.
I am not happy in this relationship so why stay in it? I am treated like shit all the time. He can not stay sober for his family. He is not taking drugs now that I know of because of his job but who knows how long that will last. I was just recently told that he does not want to work anymore.
For years I have suffered from Emotional and Verbal abuse and it has taken a great toll on me. I get depressed and start to feel like the kids are better off without me and him. I know that they are not better off without me. They are my life but I can not help feeling like that.
My life just sucks. I was working nights for only 5 hours a night but that job came to a close for me. It was a temporary job...
What do I do??? I get to talk to someone today about things. Some support woman and we will see how things turn out then. I was told by my idiot of a boyfriend this morning that he will no longer have his check deposited electronically into my account but yet he wants me to buy him his stupid ass cancer sticks for the week. No fucking way I am doing that. That will leave me no money in the account for me and the kids then. I won't see a dime of the check he gets now unless I take action and file for Child Support which I will get help doing this am. I need to get away from him before he causes me to lose my kids. I am not wanting to be in this relationship. I am tired of putting up with his bullshit. Especially his lies. I have the kids all damn week while he has to work then on Friday nights he wants to go to the bar and hang out. He does not want to spend any time with the kids. He has to play his stupid game on the computer, Anarchy online...
It just takes his time away from them. They need some time with him too.
Over the weekend he went out to the bar for the night and got a ride home from this sleeze bag I do not want him hanging out with. No she was not alone with him in the car. There was another male figure in the car. Anyway, he then the next day went to have fun on the water with friends Jetskiing....Where was my fun??? I have not had any time to myself in 2 weeks. That is another reason I get so depressed as well. I need some time to myself. He gets it and why can I not get it too???
I am just venting and probably not making any sense now. I am pissed off...
