It Takes a Special Man to
Fill a Stepfather's Shoes
With Father's Day coming up, it's occurred to me that this country is missing a holiday, Stepfather's Day.
If anyone deserves a special day, it's these brave souls who've had to carve out a place for themselves in readymade families with the care and caution of a neurosurgeon.
That's why we have a Bobber's Day in our family. It's our own version of Stepfather's Day, named after Bob the stepfather. Here's why we celebrate it.
The Bobber has just moved in.
If you do anything to hurt my mother, I could put you in the hospital, you know," says the college boy, who is far bigger than the stepfather.
"I'll keep that in mind," says the Bobber.
"You're not going to start telling me what to do," says the junior-high schoolboy. "You aren't my father."
"I'll keep that in mind," says the Bobber.
The college boy is on the phone. His car has broken down forty-five miles from home.
"I'll be right there," says the Bobber.
The vice principal is on the phone. The junior schoolboy has been in a fight.
"I'll be right there," says the Bobber. oI need a tie to go with this shirt," says the college boy. Pick one out of my closet," says the Bobber.
"You need to get your ear pierced," says the junior schoolboy.
"You need to stop burping at the table," says the Bobber.
"I'll try," says the boy.
"I'll think about it," says the Bobber.
"What did you think of my date last night?" asks the college boy.
"Does it make a difference?" asks the Bobber.
"Yes," says the boy.
"I need to talk to you," says the junior schoolboy.
"I need to talk to you," says the Bobber.
"We should have a stepfather-stepson bonding experience," says the college boy.
"Doing what?" asks the Bobber.
"Changing the oil in my car," says the boy.
"I knew it," says the Bobber.
"We should have a stepfather-stepson bonding experience," says the junior schoolboy.
"Doing what?" asks the Bobber.
"Driving me to the movies," says the boy.
"I knew it," says the Bobber.
"If you drink, don't get in the car. Call me," says the Bobber.
"Thanks," says the college boy.
"If you drink, don't get in the car. Call me," says the college boy.
"Thanks," says the Bobber.
"What time do I have to be home?" asks the junior schoolboy.
"11:30," says the Bobber.
"Okay," says the boy.
"Don't ever do anything to hurt him," the college boy says to me. "We need him."
"I'll keep that in mind," I say.
And so we have Bobber's Day. The boys buy their stepfather a new toy they can all play with. The Bobber grills steaks. And I am awed by our great fortune that the Bobber earned his way into this family with such grace that it now seems he was always there.
by Beth Mullally
As appeared in Chicken Soup for Parent's Soul
