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OK...so...there I was at Washington Square Mall the other day and as I was strolling through the mall...I noticed quite a few boobs on display. Women of all shapes and sizes had tank tops, tight shirts and plunging necklines on. It wasn't that I sat out to oogle boobs, oh no....I was there to power shop but obviously I became distracted. Now there was one young lady in particular...probably in her mid-to-late 20's with a nice set of cannon balls on display walking right at me. The neckline on her shirt was just above her belly button...so to say I could see cleavage would be an understatement. And again...she was probably a 36D or possibly a DD so they were REALLY out there...so I decided to go ahead and appreciate them. Yeah...I looked right at them. I didn't do it in a creepy "I wanna motorboat those things" kinda way...no...just a 1001, 1002, 1003 kinda look...and she had the NERVE to say "hope you got a good look" as we passed by.
Yes...Yes I did get a good look at those funbags you had right out there on display. Ladies...if you don't want us to appreciate your boobs, don't show them to us. Since the days of being 12 years old and trying to sneak a look at the old man's Playboys or the bra section of the Sears catalog men have been fascinated by boobs. We want to look, we want to touch, we basically LOVE boobs. You know this. You knew it when you fished in your closet and pulled out that plunging neckline. I am sure you tell your friends "I wear this because it makes me feel sexy.." and sure it does...BECAUSE WE LOOK doorknobs. If we weren't like.."Hey....nice boobs" you wouldn't feel sexy...you'd just be cold. So again I say...if you don't want me checking out your cans, wear a t-shirt.
Along the same lines...if you don't want me checking out your nipples, WEAR A BRA. If you go braless in air conditioning...know we'll be looking. This really shouldn't be a shock to you all...I mean...don't you look in the MIRROR? ENJOY our respect. Rejoice in our appreciation of your mammary monsters. Next time I am whipping out the camera phone.
I really don't have anything on butts, except that I like them
