djlonewolf1978's blog: "ramblin"

sucks been so long since we had a real winter here in sw michigan i was too young to remember cuase last good winters were back i nthe 70's and i was born in 78. so don't get enough snow locally to justify buying a snowmobile till i really got the extra money. get cold enough weather but not enough worth while snow for more than a week or so. and about all this weather is good for is cuddling which if ya read my profile i am single and right now don't have any women to spend much time with. schedules always seem to be a problem with some i meet. pretty much winter time when i don't have a g/f i relax mess around online or gaming on either the pc or the ps3. and when i got a g/f well watch alot of movies cuddled up together typically on my bed since my bedroom is where i spend most my time in the winter and got most my electronics. but at the same token as nice as it would be to have a woman to cuddle with not sure i wanna deal with that again most of what i seem to find are cheaters or users. don't need them kinda headaches.

ahh new yr losing my mind, wanting to strangle idiots that come into my work. all becuase i choose to try quitting smoking once again. all because some commy idiots think smoking bans will actually make a difference. and other them the babies having to smell it there will be no changes but heck we still gotta smell over perfumed women that could gag a skunk. our industrialized lifestyles cause more cancer than smoking. last time i tried quitting lasted 6 months punched my asst mgr and choose to start smoking again before i did something worse but i did warn him but he kept pushin me the wrong way. haha ya think second hand smoke is bad for ya ahh anoy a smoker that is trying to quit smoking that will be far worse for ya. hmm gee wonder what will be next to be baned or fees put on heard cali is trying to tax pop. hmm a great country song comes to mind: hank williams jr. coalition to ban coalitions.

well musically it is the title of my all time favorite hank williams jr song. and i can relate to the song very well. but i also have a major love of wolves always have parts of my life can be closely compared to that of a wolf. as for the lone part well most my life i have been alone not counting my family anyhow. never really started dating till i was 21 and since it has been one wreck of a relationship after another. used to stick more to vehicles than women thats why i never dated till i was 21 now i look back and i'd say even considering the good moments i wish i had stuck to my vehicles and never gotten involved with any. all it has ever led to was pain in my heart which is the only pain that hurts me. i do still from time to time open up abit if a woman catches my interest on more than just a physical level. which does not happen much anymore.

ahh seems i always think on things in my life way too much. expetially around my birthday which was monday. just thinking bout life relationships money and many other things. which for me since i usually wind up spending most of my life alone while most my friends are gettin married havin kids good family pretty much a complete life. while myself ya i can aford to do what i like most the time, but ya know something what does it matter when ya spend most your time doing things and what not alone by myself. even around what few friends i have i usually feel alone. then again doesn't help they usually either are married or atleast got good g/f's. while me all i ever seem to freakin get involved with are women that turn out to be total utter wastes of time and energy. been trying to keep myself busy with vehicles and what not but just not managing good enough. is it really too much to be able to find a woman that i can spend time with maybe even the rest of life, but nooo i gotta keep gettin involved with cheaters, liars, or women that turn out to of just wanted sex and nothing else what so ever. which ya just sex is ok but god be up front about it don't bs me just to get it. then ofcourse there have been times in the past women i have been nothing but friends with turning to me for a shoulder to cry on and at the time telling me how they wish their b/f was more like me. when heck i'll gladly admit many of them i would of gladly gotten involved with but noooo i'm too good of a friend for that. i really hate being who i am most the time. either being walked over or over looked for one reason or another. and yes i am in abit of an agravated mood tonight. there have been ones i have told how i felt and most the time they just thought i was joking or told me i was too good of a friend. now adays just too tired of it all just ain't got much energy or heart left to deal with it most the time anymore. in my heart i do want to but just not strong enough for it much currently in my life. once in awhile i can manage abit though.