okay.....everyone who knows me....knows I dont listen to the radio....
If I dont happen to hear it being spun in one of the various bars and night clubs I go to.......or happen to catch a video on the Negro Network (ne BET) when I need to get my black girl badonkadonk fix.....I pretty much havent heard it.....
I sometimes set my alarm to HOT 107...... mainly because The Early Morning Show that they have is funny as hell.......and I know what ever BOLSHEVIK (thats bullshit in Kaviar speak) is playing..... will likely jar me awake and ruin any chances of me falling asleep again.....thereby prompting me to start my day.....
Then there is the chance that ANGIE/HEATHER/BIZZLE/SPANGLE DANNER or what ever name she is going by these days .....along with TK and NAPPY WILSON will be having a discussion about my myspace posts....(No fishing for compliments)......but I do love their early morning show....and Bizzle is fine for a white girl.....TK is a strong black sistah like my moms....Nap Wizzle is like my favorite DJ in this city....of course Ill never tell him that...(No Homo)
I used to listen to Twitch and Danni Bruns....just because I happen to know them.........and they are both retarded and make me pee my pants just a little....but I dont know what happened to them.....but neither are on the radio these days.....plus....93X is just a rock version of HOT 107/K 97/ and Power 99 (now defunct).....mening they play the same music over and over all day long.....and Q107 is the radio version of TRL.....which sucks even worse than BET.....
so mainly....being the emcee/rocker and aspiring recording artist I am.....and to keep my music from sounding like that bs on the airwaves.....I only listen to underground internet stuff.....or the stuff Ive made.....or Memphis artists that I like....(Free Sol, Tunnel Clones, IMC, IGM, Menefer, Egypt Central, Tela, etc).....you know.....
However.....Every few months or so....... I check out what the kids are listening to just to stay up on trends and learn what the ghetto is trying to express.......
The biggest rage has been this whole chicken noodle soup nonsense which is just a covert analogy for pissing on someone in the shower.......Real talk......I'll spit game on that in a minute......
Another popular song is from an artist named JIBBS........ Like one of those pop songs produced by WILL.I.AM (WHY......my brova.....WHY!!!!!)......this rap song has been marketed by geniuses........
It's so bad that you have to talk about it with someone just to confirm that monkeys haven't taken over your radio.........Actually, monkeys are performing........but the T.I.'s still get the checks from Corporate America.......(NO PT BARNUM)
This is when I try to do something on the level of Hip-Hop scholarship in quantifying my contempt for this song........ Less my comments befall the scorn of the internet's monkey music stanleys......
It's a pretty simple formula....... anyhoo, keep in mind that I do have a graduate degree....
1) First, what we need to do is review the lyrics to the song(s).
2) Do a total word count on the songs (word being a highly subjective term when Hip-Hop lyrics are concerned).
3) Scan the songs for the number of polysyllabic words, since these are the most complex to form into rhyme verse.
Whether you want to admit it or not........ real good rap music can renegotiate any language like a piece of clay........ That means that within Hip-Hop the English language is deconstructed and reassembled...........sometimes with a regional dialect........
If you love Hip-Hop (No Hipster Rachel)......... then you are already familiar with the twang of southern rappers.......the nasal sound of west coast artists and so on....... My point for all of this is to show you that there is dope rap music that represents the zenith of the art.............. And there is bolshevik........which is most likely what you will hear......
I wondered which song I would use to compare and contrast the JIBBS 'Chain Hang Low' with........ I didn't want to use anything from BIG DADDY KANE or RAKIM......... because that would be like watching KOBE aka Rape Boy score 85 points against the Raptors.......... Get it?.......... Raptors?!?.......... Yeah, I don't get it either.......
I just then remembered watching KEITH MURRAY open the stage for EPMD back in the day........ Dude ripped through the audience with his vocal dexterity and lyrical gymnastics........... Yep, KEITH MURRAY would be the perfect dude to use as an experiment since he is one of the few rappers that can put the word 'experiment' in a verse........(check out the lyrics to the most beutifullest thing)
Hold up!...... Hold up!........ We not even gonna use that song for this little test......... Although the early numbers have the total word count at 557.............. and the complex (polysyllabic) word count at almost fifty........... Those are some RAKIM or KRS ONE quotients.............Don't front, dudes from Long Island can flow on some Harvard level shit (Busta Rhymes like wha?)........... Here's the breakdowns…
JIBBS - 'Chain Hang Low'
word count = 732 (unusually high for snap music content)
polysyllabic words = 6 ('platinum' repeated three times)
KEITH MURRAY - 'The Rhyme'
word count = 520
polysyllabic words = 22 ('metaphor' appears twice)
Less that 1% of the JIBBS song contains a complex word, and y'all wonder why Black babies can't read?
its an interesting formula.....a Fascinating formula........ However, Keith Murray also makes up words like Beautifullest.......
I should also mention how Jibbs' song is a recycled minstrel favorite....... My ears hang low…....these young cats nowadays .....*shakes head in disgust*......
The Idea/thing (either prevalent theme or halfway interesting reference) count from these two songs… "Chain" has seven by my count — jewelry, cars, "owning" blocks, gang banging, shitting yourself, mutants, and cranes......
No time for a thorough count on "Rhyme"...... but anyone paying attention has reason to open a dictionary.....an encyclopedia...... and books on history...... biology..... physiology.....chemistry… not that it's a cause/effect deal...... but at least there's the expression...... and assumption of intelligence.....
This is why I won't let my baby(ies)....... (when I get a Memphis chick preggers)....... listen to rap music with the slightest connection to the city of Memphis.....(unless its Fathom 9)......Atlanta......(unless its outkast)........or Houston (unless its Scarface).....and dont get me started on tha crooked letta state.....(David Banner not included -- at least he has a degree and was the SGA Pres in college).....
I'll also have admonish you parentals out there to cover their ears when you go to the ghetto malls (Southland, Hickory Hood, Oak Court)......because you know that fool Jibbs went platinum on fucking ring tone sales...... (No Harold Bean)...
for what it's worth…i called the local hip-hop/cRAP station and asked that the "chain" song be dropped from the spin cycle…they keep playing it…so i just don't listen anymore…
lately i've been listening to Prince -For You circa 1978 and classic soul like Teddy Pendergrass-Love TKO, Turn off the Lights,Close the Door…Al Green and Bob Marley...
maybe it's me........but I just can't listen to the same 6 or 7 "tunes" every time I turn on the radio!....... today's urban radio is what it is…but boy do I miss the GOLDEN AGE OF HIP HOP.....even though I was almost too young to really enjoy it......
like mtv-video killed the radio star.......... and Clear Channel and all the rest killed urban radio, i guess…
Kinda sad how the polysyllabic word usage spiked in the 90's and has since taken a sharp dip.
