To all the 13 in counting... I wish that I had been there to hold you when you passed from life to death, but I guess it was ment to be that way... we are always alone. I hope you were not scared. Your in a better place now with the Lord. That you love, and you are whole. I miss you, I'll never forget you. I loved you yesturday, today, and forever. Love alway, CripGirl!!! Now... in'a freestyle fo you cause I know how you loved the rap sceane... iight here I go heres my words from my heart for you!!!
Why does God let good people suffer?
And bad people prosper?
You loved us more then anything on the planet. You let us know it and I think thats why you planned it. The way you lived was just a little bit different now call you crazy, diagnose skitsofrinic, wow! You were loved in your hood for most your life, and when you wasen't you were fuccin' wit somebodys life. But thats ok thats how things are but now your its like your locced up behind closed doors and no one can see you or be with you untill their time. You built me up and let me know it like I needed to. V I learned from you and also how they treated you. The devil pumped you full of drugs like you was a horse, so many drugs that you wern't ever comming home fo sho. I know whats out of sight is out of mind to some people but you will never leave my heart, my soul, my mind cause you were specil to me to all of your hommies. Your body was strong though... you were in it for the long hall. You were waitng for God to call you while the devil was trying to breake you but you never let out. Just resited the Bible till the end you were done. Your life was rough, and your pain was real. You hurt for us... and now I know the deal. You had depression, stress, constant shaccy thoughts, you coulden't fight shyt. 16+ years, these words just arn't enough for what you went through. And what you ment too! Brings me to tears you made me be who I am today. You live inside of me today, I pray... I pray... forgive me I ran away, I know you understand though because we all live for a reason. One of yours was thought... breathe... breathe... My earliest memory of you was when we had plan (you remember) and it made errybody mad but we did it in hopes of helping someone out but made it worse... and the funny things we talked about in are pms made me glad to know I had you as a friend... you lasted long... and fo awile you were the strongest person that I knew and I put nothing above that you see? Growning up thinking I was stuntin erry time I grew. Now I see that you just wanted me to follow through a lesson in life thats more important then to follow you... I remember that time in life where you were all alone and someone came to hurt you and almost took your life you saw pictures of your friends and fam in side your mind the cry you must have gave starrin' down a 12 gage... and for a moment in time they put you in a bird cage... and for that moment in time you didn't have a word to say, laughing in confrences wit you was the funner times and laughing wit you in Japan chat were the funner times too... I will miss you so much you were like a brother to me and it will be harder for Dan and Destiney but soon one day will all see you up in Heaven and have fun not just on yahoo but right next to each other son and laugh about the hard times the good ones and the bad... and thank God above that were all togther again... the love was lost but then was found again I wish you had stayed and now your in Heaven looking down on us with love and grace... blue collar to da bone, spin your days away from home, wish that they would be the ones when you might be with your son, make my way to be the one, make your way untill you done. Life be going tough for real, I want your Dad to know the deal, working your fingers to the bone just to spend a day at home and wont you regreat the way our relationship is played? Across Yahoo and myspace. I spray my love erry time I spray my words across the USA. And whos to say which ways the right way to love the people you love they way you love them? FUCC the money, and the funny situations in the past, father and son love last, you helped me be who I am today, you live in side of my heart, I pray that I can make you understand that I loved you all the way. I loved you, all the way!!! Breathe... Breathe...!!!
IIght... well that took me like 4 hours... but its all for you!!! I miss you Cuzz... C40, C51, 3:12, 2:11!!! Love ya, y4hoos_ill3st_cripgirl 420 aka Joanna!!!
DarkNymph