Through my veins flow words. I turn those words into poems and short stories. I did this one to mark a special occasion in my life. Two days ago I celebrated 21 months with the love of my life. He made the comment it was a nice stepping stone. That is the inspiration behind this poem about the jagged rocks and smooth pebbles of relationships.
It's a little wordy. So I thank you in advance for reading it. But, in my opinion, it is my best work to date.
- Stepping Stones
Twenty-one months ago our lives changed for the better.
At least in my opinion, I assume you feel the same.
There have been many rocks along the way.
Some made us stumble, others we’ve leapt over without a thought.
This is to commemorate those small pebbles.
Pain:
From day one we knew this wasn’t going to be easy.
True love isn’t simply sunshine and rainbows.
Turtles have a hard impenetrable shell.
Butterflies start life as ugly worms.
We hurt the other to protect ourselves.
Failing to realize it does more harm than good.
“Time heals all wounds.” Said by Menander.
Not when the ache comes from a person who’s more afraid of themselves,
than to make the effort to believe in the love they feel.
It’s only when the guard drops that trust begins.
It’s only when you open the heart do we experience life to the fullest.
Missed Opportunities:
There have been many unanswered questions, disregarded phone calls,
e-mails deleted without a thought given to the fact it was important to one.
Days were we could have seen the other, but didn’t because of pride.
Moments have slipped by without souls speaking from fear of rejection,
not knowing how the other would react, or fear of being proven right.
Unspoken requests, communicated pleas, and tender hearted vibes
put in the air get looked over by dread of giving what is wanted.
A total disregard of emotions cover the other from having to experience them also.
“Love isn’t supposed to hurt.” A wise woman once told me.
I beg to differ!
It’s the pain from love which lets you know it’s a living, breathing entity.
Misguided Emotions:
Feelings come into play which shouldn’t enter this type of relationship.
Though it makes for a more “real” relationship, they have the potential to kill.
Envy over women in the past, present, and future shouldn’t even be imagined.
Misplaced anger when you can’t vocalize without repercussions you want to avoid.
Disappointment over heartaches unintentional inflicted.
Guilt from feeling misguided emotions.
Bitterness from episodes of depression on thinking about home lives.
Discouragement when thoughts of love not being returned intrude.
“Jealousy is nothing more than a fear of abandonment.” Some person spoke.
It’s an unrealistic fear, granted.
But when you experience the green-eyed monster it’s saying how much you care.
The building blocks haven’t all be jagged.
There many joyous memories to celebrate.
Many stones danced upon with laughter.
Others skipped across the walk to be watched bouncing.
We have to remember those to tell the complete story.
For no tale is one sided.
To get rid of the negative you focus on the positive.
This is for those moments too.
Desire:
Without it, love wouldn’t last long.
You have to want a person to love them.
Laying all your cards on the table and becoming completely naked before your lover’s eyes.
Saying that you belong to the other, telling them you have them, all speak of desire.
Turtles have soft underbellies.
Butterflies flutter when happy.
Protecting one’s self is thrown out the window when it’s the completion of the soul you crave.
Finding the beauty in a casually overlooked gardenia bush is what desire is all about.
"Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." Frost once penned.
Knowing you are wanted, the need for reassurance, and the driving forces of lust all equal
the ultimate power of desiring someone you love.
Dreams:
Fantasies of afternoons spent in love.
Woolgathering about graduation day and who’ll be in the audience.
Stargazing into the heavens to find your matching burst of light.
Sharing dreams about live, love, home life, children all are required to know someone.
Not to dream is equal to not understanding unlimited love.
When pushed aside, cast over, and thrown away we realize it’s the dreams of life that keep us sane.
Healing on the inside is a dream of both.
Moonlight nights, red roses, feeding each other, laughing, loving until breathless
all wonderfully denied dreams.
“A dream is a wish your heart makes.” Walt Disney filmed these words.
To dream is to give completely of yourself.
Love:
Without the intensity of this emotion we wouldn’t be here today.
If there wasn’t a connection, we feel on every level, we wouldn’t have made it this far.
We were merely existing before.
One wore blinders, the other had stone walls and a glass heart.
One gave up hope of love coming, the other shut away the thought of it returning.
The combination makes greatness appear where only average was before.
Opens up the senses to notice beauty all around.
Doesn’t need bonds, vows, commitments to understand it’s true.
“I love you with all I am.” Spoken from the opening heart, released by the freed soul.
No greater gift can be had then acknowledging the truth behind the words.
Unconditional love at its finest when spoken by a truthful tongue.
The best of both worlds can only be understood when you realize
that everything in the last twenty-one months has been based on reality.
The next stones we build will be stronger, tighter, and hold more weight than the ones
we discard today.
My wish is for many more months, if not years.
Your wish is held in secret until the time where you’re comfortable enough
to acknowledge it yourself.
Everything I have is yours for the taking.
All you have to do is take the next step on the path of love.
And that next tread is saying you love me just as you are, and with all that you are.
© June 17, 2009 by Lori
