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Loki's blog: "Poems"

created on 01/24/2007  |  http://fubar.com/poems/b48357

...

im good at helping others... but i have yet to learn how to help myself.. guess its just something i gotta live with? just once id like a little something thrown my way ya know?... maaaaan fuck it, im stuck in it, long live life, yet life seems too long to live alone and alone it shall be till the day it happens. it happens to those who wait, those good things, but will it be too late? will the good have not come fast enough? fo sho i shall wait and see, theres still many pages in this book im reading called "my long life", the story of the life is again, too long.. i wish i had a spoiler and knew if the book turned out to be good, if somewhere down the line the chapters started to get a little brighter... but for now i must use my nightlight to give a false hope for something that could possible be there if i keep trying

I see her while I Dream.

I see her hair while I dream. As it blows in the wind i smell her love. In my most worried state, just the soft touch next to my face calms my force. I would be lost without her. I see her eyes while I dream. As she glances at me they speak words unto my soul. In my darkest hours her eyes shine bright through the mist, I would be lost without her. I see her lips while I dream. As she smiles it melts my heart. In my deepest depression her lightest kiss brings me to my feet. I would be lost without her. I see her hands while I dream. As she lightly holds my hands I feel the strongest bond. In my loneliest of times her gentle touch soothes my pains. I would be lost without her. ~Loki~ Now if only i had someone to be her :(

untitled

the sight of lust in my eyes as i close in, it puts me in a state of mind like nothing else is around. the smell of your scent in the wind drives me nuts as i close in on your position. your in trouble, im a fiend for your beauty, i cant have enough. your eyes drive me wild, your hair like silken strands of gold. To have and to hold you is what i strive to achieve, when shall you be mine? when will time break the barrier of the distance that holds us apart? you are too good for me, i know this, yet i cant give up now. your perfect in every sense of the word, you will be the one i cherish this i promise. im a fiend for your beauty, your in trouble, i can never have enough. your body is what i long to hold close and dear, when shall time take over and bring us near? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I walk Miles inside my soul insearch of who i am, i come empty handed with dark holes inside my past. I have lost what i am and i havent a clue what i am becoming. My insanity is now my reality as i drown in the flood of pain my heart unleashes. Yet i dont understand the pain, its not there for any reason besides to tear me down. I have lost my grip and fallen, fallen into the depths of my own shadow which i have no path. I have no light or road to travel upon to save me, i am lost. I have lost my way out of insanity. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- to meet the girl and look into her eyes, she could be the one. the warmth in her touch and the sense of security she gives you, she said lets be friends. the ove you gave her, the ways you thought to please her. you wanted nothing more than to show you were good for her, she said lets just be friends. when all see how she was treated and see how you will treat her, and youve got a cheering section for the victory of this huge defeat, yet, she said lets just be friends. she took her warm hands and ever so softly ripped open the chest and took your heart from where it sat, and she said lets just be friends, as she stomps on your soul ever so softly. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Look out for the devil shook you out, hung up by the toes from the roof of the mind slung into a sling while you recoop the spirit so the soul may fly out into nights sky to lose the dream that never was that's always been to hide from the reality which you once grasped wait you never had it, it slips your grip you ship out to the flip up shit flies up your out you twisted up, didn't tie your shoes you trippin, face plant inside your basecamp within your thoughts your losin it you lost your mind your psycho your psyche is screwed you don't understand your thoughts this syndrom is classic your sick you've become a virus to the process of thought till the visions open your eyes and you see the light no longer blinded by the murk of the mist which you hid the truth to spread the lies to hide who you are but not who you've become, paranoid up the ass as you let the musics bass pound in your head over repeteadly steady your done --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- dont understand the way the mind can twerk to the advantage of the thoughts you want oout and twist the words and squeeze out the juice of your emotions while disrupting the thought process in general making it your bitch and twisting the rules of reality to express the changes of the swings as they go back and forth and you climb into that cave to dig out the words to excavate the newest editions of the who and what you are to tell the world to fuck off, yea, for sure,.. the minds telling me, whatever drink(drug) your on, ill take a casefull hahahah ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ trust in a lie that keeps you from the pain of the truth that hurts to the bone that sheds the core to reveal the scared emotions you once bore on the sleeve of your arm to show you gave no shit about the lie that you thought would hide you from the truth to rebound the truth you told to hide the lies of the life that you wanted that you destroyed only to backlash to the pain and mistust of the valiant ones who tried to save your soul in the mist of time while stuck in your own thoughts of forgetfullness you should have remembered to dispell the lies and bring forth the truth of the past to save the future while your paranoid sitting in the present..... --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How did you last so long? Cutting it deep to the core of the problem finding no solution but the demise of the hope that was once a dream that had a chance of becoming a reality.. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

fiend

the sight of lust in my eyes as i close in, it puts me in a state of mind like nothing else is around. the smell of your scent in the wind drives me nuts as i close in on your position. your in trouble, im a fiend for your beauty, i cant have enough. your eyes drive me wild, your hair like silken strands of gold. To have and to hold you is what i strive to achieve, when shall you be mine? when will time break the barrier of the distance that holds us apart? you are too good for me, i know this, yet i cant give up now. your perfect in every sense of the word, you will be the one i cherish this i promise. im a fiend for your beauty, your in trouble, i can never have enough. your body is what i long to hold close and dear, when shall time take over and bring us near?

doh'

I walk Miles inside my soul insearch of who i am, i come empty handed with dark holes inside my past. I have lost what i am and i havent a clue what i am becoming. My insanity is now my reality as i drown in the flood of pain my heart unleashes. Yet i dont understand the pain, its not there for any reason besides to tear me down. I have lost my grip and fallen, fallen into the depths of my own shadow which i have no path. I have no light or road to travel upon to save me, i am lost. I have lost my way out of insanity.

and she said

to meet the girl and look into her eyes, she could be the one. the warmth in her touch and the sense of security she gives you, she said lets just be friends. the love you gave her, the ways you thought to please her. you wanted nothing more than to show you were good for her, she said lets just be friends. when all see how she was treated and see how you will treat her, and youve got a cheering section for the victory of this huge defeat, yet, she said lets just be friends. she took her warm hands and ever so softly ripped open the chest and took your heart from where it sat, and she said lets just be friends, as she stomps on your soul ever so quietly.

this ones from the heart

this ones actually came out better than i hoped Life: Life is beautiful, but shes beyond the door which i havent the key for. I look through the peep hole and see the world outside, as im stuck in my dark room. In life we are stuck in rooms, its up to us to unlock the doors, and which doors we go through. Sometimes i feel as if ive used my keys on the wrong doors in life. You dont get an unlimited amount, you gotta earn these keys. There is no simple task to gain a key either, usually theres sacrafices to be made to gain a key. But, unfotunatly for me, ive used my keys to unlock the black doors in my life. I didnt take advantage of wha i had infront of me, i didnt see what i really wanted. All i ever wanted was to be happy, was to have the nice things in life. I wante what everyone else had, but i didnt see what they had until i lost the chance to gain it. Now i stare out the locked door, as she stands on the other end. Just like a visitor, she knocks, and if the doors unopened, she leaves. She walks out the door, never to be gazed upon again, ive lost my chance, i have no more keys. I now lay in my room awaiting the chance to earn it back, i know it wount be the same as if i chose that door first. Theres something else now beyond this door, something dark and clouded, i cant see whats in store for me. Life is beautiful behind this door, yet its unavailable to me for as long as i dont weild the power to turn the lock. Ive lost my will, my way, my light. The truth is, ive givin up on her, ive givin up on the happiness i once thought i could have. Its gone, that door to me ramians locked and i have no timeframe for it to open. Life is beautiful beyond the door i cannot open.

not really a poem but..

lets play::tonight we shall play a game of wits and challenge, for you seem to think you have the knowledge of death we will play with your life. you think you know whats gonna happen to you, die at an old age and with a family and kids. the thing you didnt think of was the outcome of pushing my buttons...so tonight we shall play a game of life and death, and this my friend, i shall play for keeps.
1. you ever feel like crying, just to let it out, cause being a guy your not supposed to show emotions and stand tall..? yet, you would like to just one night, let it all out..and yet, each tear you attempt to shed feels like a needle right in the eye, and the pain brings in the anger, then you realize hwy you dont cry.... because if you cry your defeated...your done, youve thrown in the towel....so once again you strap up your boots, lift your head up, and take it all in...each emotional bullet, coming from a machine gunnist who has no intention on letting up on the gunplay....only thing to do is to shoot back...and yet, each shot you make, is like a shot into the cranium...driving you crazy, driving you mad...and restarting the whole entire scenario... (""1REVISED--Do you ever feel like crying, just to let it out? But being a guy your not supposed to show emotions, your supposed to stand tall. Yet, you would like to just one night, let it all out, but, each tear you attempt to shed feels like a needle piercing the eye.The pain brings in anger, then you realize why you dont cry, because if you cry then your defeated,your done, youve thrown in the towel.So once again you strap up your boots, lift your head up, and take it all in,each emotional bullet, coming from a machine gunnist who has no intention on letting up on the gunplay,only thing to do is to shoot back.Yet, each shot you take, is like a shot into the cranium, its driving you crazy, driving you mad, and restarts the whole entire scenario youve worked so hard to try to get past."") 2.two steps up into my mind, like getting lost for years on the arctic wastelands. cold like the depths of the soul of a broken man. barfight, fight for your life, this is lifes fight, you fight to live, you give your life if the fight you lose. gunfight, you fought, bullets fly, you hide, harsh pains, attack from the brain, your going insane. dark hall, screw em all, allyways, pretty face, beautiful eyes, her looks are lies, in this fight you can only hope nobody dies. her beautiful smile, knife to the back. wicked grin her spear to the chin, no way her touch is harsh, no wait, nails are daggers to the heart. these two shall depart, one chance was a failed attempt. the second chance is the next lead on to the next big let down. sit down kid, your done, you lost, youve fought to hard, give it up. her smile once again, its a trap, the trap springs, foothold, you where already told not to trust the pretty lies, she lets you die. the sharp knives, like angry beehives, razor to the vein, yet is all this ive said just in vain? 3.He tries his hardest to pull himself onto the edge. his mind says let go, his fingers fight to hold him up. five fingers grasp the edge. he knows about the drama hes been put through, he feels screwed. four fingers grasp the edge. he remembers the feelings he once felt, he sees the trash his feelings now call home. three fingers grasp the edge. he remembers those who judged him, trampled his name. two fingers remain grasping the edge. he cant forget those whose windows have gone black, eyes contain dead souls. one finger left grasping the edge. he realizes now, the world would hate to see him survive. he uses that last finger to pull his tired body back onto the edge. today is not the day to give up. 4.When he walks by he sees you divert your eyes, you look in another direction. he knows its rude yet he stares at you, he cant help it. you feel nervous, your afraid of him, if only you knew he would do anything for you. you know theres no reason to fear him, yet you hate him. your friends hate him, unknown hate, they dont even know why they hate him. if only you gave the chance to get to know him. but for now your too late. hes moved on, he no longer stares. you notice now hes not intrested in you. youve lost your chance to learn who he is, youve lost your chance to save him. 5.Tonight is the night we shall fight over the words of a Saint, spoken in the tounge of the devil. Someone we trust, who happens to be the one we hate. Seen through the eyes of a child the world is perfect, as we age our vision clouds, we lose our focus. The saint shall speak the word of truth, yet we ignore it as the ramblings of a demon. Cast aside, weve now been banishe as the last grain of sand falls, ending our time. The saint appears to you once more, gives you a second chance. Do you choose to listen to the words, or ignore them and be lost within your own ignorance? 6.Girl of my dreams, she tugs at the heart strings. Shes my own pink rose, wait and listen as the harp sings. My eyes gro, i wanna take her all in, glance at her eyes as we watch the sunrise. She goes, i watch as her hair flows. The birds tend to tweet to the rythm of her sweet bodies beat. Each step as she takes while she leaves, my heart greaves, my soul flees. I chase after her, shes gone, oh where could she have gone? 7.You trust in Love, Loves mistrust time flies and our hearts die. Face stained by tears, covered in rust she wount love you no matter how you try. Even still, everyday you want her, your lust even you cant understand the reason why. Why even try, every attempt is a bust. You live and Love You hate and die Pray this pain take you above Pray this pain isnt your fate You trust in Love, Loves mistrust time flies as my heart and SOUL dies. 8.The streets cold, grounds old accident prone and he has no home. This is through the eyes of a broken man. The love is lost, paid the cost lies reside as he dies inside. This is through the eyes of a broken man. The dice hes rolled, the luck of the draw lost his family, hes got no place to be. This is through the eyes of a broken man. The life hes lost, the devil hes crossed he tries and tries, and yet inside he dies. This is through the eyes of a broken man. If only he had the chance to make it right the chance he lost that one cold night. This is through the eyes of a broken man.
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