im on that boss type status's blog: "poems"

he says things that tear me apart, but deep inside i still want him. his sins i'm still in love with. his influence i still miss. i only wish i could tell him that im sorry. and have one more chance. im still feeling the pain. i still feel like i have lost, not only my true love, but my best friend. so many things have come, so many things have gone. my feelings are still strong, but his has taken a u-turn. he no longer feels the way he said he did. every one said that we would never last. so i owe all of those people an appology, because you were right.

if i knew it would be the last time that i would see you fall asleep. i would tuck you in more tightly and pray the lord, your soul to keep. if i knew it would be the last time that i would see you walk out the door. i would give you a hug and kiss and call you back for one more. if i knew it would be the last time i would hear your voice lifted up in praise. i would video tape each action and word so i could play them back day after day. if i knew it would be the last time i could spare an extra minute or two to stop and say "i love you". instead of assuming you would know i do. if i knew it would be the last time i would be there to share your day. well im sure you'll have so many more. so i can let just this one slip away. for surely there is always tomorrow to make up for an oversight. and we always et a second chance to make every thing right. there will always be another day to say our "i love you's" and certainly there is another chanceto say our "anything i can do's" but just in case i might be wrong and today is all i get. i would like to say how much i love you and i hope you never forget. tomorrow is not promised to any one young of old alike. and today may be the last chance you get to hold your loved one tight. so if your waiting for tomorrow, why not do it today? for if tomorrow never comes, you will surely regret the day, that you didnt take the extra time for a smile, a hug, or a kiss. and you were to busy to grant someone, what turned our to be their one last wish. so hold you loved one close today. and whisper in their ear. tell them how much you love them and that you will always hold them near. take time to say "im sorry", "please forgive me" "thanks you" or "its ok". and if tomorrow never comes, you will hae no regrets about today

where do i go from here? what choice do i make? i know what i want and yet to actually fight for it, feels like its too much. i still love you, and you know who you are. every time i look at you, it gets harder to forget the past. when i look into his eyes, i only see what we once were. is there ever a chance that we might be together? or is it just a dream that i want to come true. i see people fighting for something they want and it only leads to heart break. so should i take that same path or should i travel down the road less taken?

The sun is shining for the first time in days, The rain clouds have gathered and rolled away, The birds have come out again to play... ...Something new will happen today As I walk along my daily path, I see you standing, fresh from a bath, I can see your face from a mile away And can hear every whispered word you say. Your jet-black hair with a hint of gleam Your pretty eyes with smile serene Are the prettiest I have ever seen Or am I just walking in my dream? All the hearts around me flew to you And every boy was craving for you And as you turned away from each bloke I heard their hearts as they shattered and broke I hold mine close, I hold mine dear It's been broken too many times, I fear And before it frees itself from my grip I have to run away from your midst. But whither can I run? Whither can I fly? For every dark alley is brightened by your smile I kneel down and pray for the sake of my heart "Help me, Lord, she is the Devil's art" I'm fighting to keep you out of my head But when I fought my heart, it bled Oh, I cannot take this anymore! You've won the battle, my heart is yours The threatening clouds are back in the sky They shine in the tear that falls from my eye A question unanswered, will you answer true? "Will you ever want me as much as I want you?"

Take a deep breath it will be alright, You know he didn’t mean what was said in that fight. Its all just words spilling out, But it leaves you feeling the doubt. You feel hurt and broken, Like your lost and words were left unspoken. You wish things weren’t and others were said, The whole night is stuck in your head. Maybe you did do something wrong, But now its too late he’s already gone. You cant take the things you said back now, You have to learn to deal with this, but how? You know he’s gone and not coming back, Maybe it was that eighteen pack. But you’ll never now cause he cant tell, You pray at night he didn’t go to hell. But how is it that you survived and he died You’ve been a bad girl, you have sinned, you have lied. You wish you told him you loved him before it was too late, Maybe you could have even asked him out on a date. But you were too shy, You never thought he would die. But whose fault is that You cant go back So suck it up and suck it in Breath out, breath in You’re the one who has sinned

Into her pool of silence sorrow My word fall like heavy stones Striking, splashing, and shattering The tranquilness of her pool of tears, Afficting her wound anew. Oh, my distressing words! Solicitous and compassionate I evisioned them to be. Instead, profane the peace And silence pain she knew. Why then, Do I go on, Saying these words That harm instead of heal?

Remember, I walked among youI watched over all that you lovedI protected all that was trueJust remember how I loved Remember, I fought for all of usWe stood against countless legionsDon’t let what we did get buried in the dustSave all our conquered regions Remember, I loved each one of you with all me heartIf only I could have given you moreInstead everything fell apartMaybe I just wasn’t strong enough to tap the core Please my beloved remember meFor I shall remember you for all eternity

When everything is said and done more is said then done U try to come to an understanding Discuss motives, feelings, until u can stand no more but nothing changes in the next hour so u wait a day u wait a week U wait a month Shit, u wait a year But when everything is said and done more is said then done the realzation hits u a punch to ur ego so u try to have another talk U try to clarify try to deal with the situation as a mature adult dispite the fact that u just want to cry like a baby and scream from inpatience cause u feel urself going crazy talkin lately is as pointless as the war in Iraq Talkin to u is as useless as President Bush Because after everything is said and done more is said then done....

Im not so sure if it will end Or when it began But im still in love with all your sins Im not sure when But surely one day it will end But for now im still in love with all your sins I know its the only way for my heart to mend So one day i will leave.... And i will hate you and all your sins This torment will not take me over, it will not win So its goodbye now Im no longer in love with you and all your sins

I don't know which I hate more The sad skies or the tears on the floor As you turn and walk away I look for the right words to say to make you stay to make you stay