BrightEyedArtist's blog: "ME"

created on 05/21/2007 | http://fubar.com/me/b84553 | 4 followers

posted on 02/02/2009&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;04:02&nbs-08:00;am

POEM: I cant stand it anymore.......
http://fubar.com/poem-i-cant-stand-it-anymore/b84553-696860

I bust

I bust my ass to make things good for other's. I do so much on so many levels. I get used, treated badly let alone given credit for what I do. Thats just in my own work life. & here in fu-land, Im accused of being selfish, yet, my accuser doesnt seems to see what I do, do for other's. & Then uses what I do as a tool, to justify his selfishness. Im called a theif for a gif someone else made for me. I deal with assholes in my shout box that insist they are above or more speacial then the rest so they can be in my fu-family list. & never seem to grasp my policy let alone conceive the concept. Those that are in my fu-family list are there cause they earned it. I dont ask for blast's, HH let alone real cash. I pay for many & my own stickies & blasts. I figure if your here enough you should be rewarded. I spread myself thin. In trying to make up for those whom take their time for me. I do what I can for what little time I do have. I come here to release, to forget about my day. The unrealistic ideals are so truly insane. I've come so close to deleting this account. But after all that I've invested. I can't bring myself to it. But in this personal battle of mine. There is this one motto that keeps coming to my mind. If it takes a dollar amount to know where you stand. Let alone to get somewhere, that merit & quality alone should be the pretence at hand. That the dollar amount spent, is all this accounts worth. I see whorish antics on a constant on this site. Yet jealouse bitches & un-cultured assholes, leave obscene & rude comments on my slides & in my comments. My personal & work life is rather full. How hard is that to be understood. Let alone to come to me, in some way or another, & say some of the things you say. Do you honestly truly know me? If you did would you dare speak to me in that manor or that way. Would you be as kind as I am to you? Would you understand where I'm coming from with out the information ever being a tool? None the less, I'm sick of the double standard poor me bullshit. The politics here are more then nausiating. What is this all really about? Some power hungry antics that the words rather then actions have more clout? & This make sense,... how? The one thing Ive seen,... That undoubtedly, My mind will never be changed. Is this thing here thats is "suposedly" a game. Is more of a houseing for the insane. The lengths people go to, for the fu-fame. I mean in all reality,... when in a crowd, speaking of this fu-scene. How many people ask you, whats fubar, or to repeat its name? Let alone other's that go on with the definitions about the fubar "meaning". It's clear to me that those whom spend their life doing fu-time. Honestly need to get out more & begin living a real life. Not that, that hasnt been said a million times before. Oh I know, venting all this here & now is about as useful as me getting up from here and slamming my head into the nearest door. But I do beleive this is what blogs are for.

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