IrishPuterGeek's blog: "Photography"

I like big butts and I cannot lie. In case you haven’t learned this about me already, I’m a bit of what some may call a “chubby chaser”. I’m proud of it. I think my taste leans towards some pretty hot women. Yet nearly every woman I’ve ever met, especially those who have modeled for me are always conscious about the way they look; specifically in the weight department. No. Conscious is not the right word. Self-conscious, overly concerned, neurotic; those are more accurate.

Now before I start my praise of the Big Beautiful Woman (affectionately to be referred to as BBW for the duration) I would like to play “devil’s advocate” for those of you nay-sayers who just don’t subscribe to my logic. It would seem logical for boney people, such as me, to simply argue that if a woman does not like her weight she should simply go on diet, work out more, or take “better care of herself”. I once these point of views and let me just say that it caused quite a bit of stress in my marriage. You see, nearly every woman will be considered “overweight” by society at some point in their life. I have the opposite problem which actually helps me relate well to the negative impact society’s views place on our shoulders. I’m a string bean of a man. All my life I have struggled to put weight on. I’ve talked to several women who think I’m absolutely nuts, until I explain how society’s roles apply to me. Men are supposed to be strong and it’s perfectly acceptable to “husky”. Skinny men are considered weak and undesirable. It does not matter how much I eat, work out, or take care of my body. I have a wiry build that hides the muscle I have. At this point I usually get an understanding nod. So, with that in mind let me address these issues more directly from my skinny point of view.

For those of us who have not directly experienced a diet please let me delve into what a diet really is from my point of view. My definition of a diet is a
reconditioning of daily habits to decrease caloric intake to levels that are required to maintain a “healthy” weight. For someone trying to lose weight
however this requires one to take in less than what most everyone else consumes in order to work backwards on the scale. For many who “struggle” with their weight a diet is actually a self-inflicted, torturous denial of pleasant tasting foods for the weight loss they feel will make them feel attractive to others. Intakes of vital nutrients are often overlooked causing a person to basically starve themselves to “burn the fat” (a societal euphemism for forcing your body to eat itself). If one is smart enough to understand nutritional requirements the foods they force themselves to consume are typically expensive, undesirable or do not contain enough substance to give them a feeling of being pleasantly full. In short the ordeal of a diet tends to be at the least a sacrifice requiring a great deal of willpower; at most a torturous, life-changing ordeal that leaves one emotionally depleted and hesitant to try again.

But you can’t have a successful diet if you don’t work out! Ah yes, and unfortunately this has been proven by science. I will tell you even from my skinny experience that there are some people that just DO NOT enjoy working out. I’m sure with the broad range of people out there someone will be reading this pondering the insane notion that everyone does not get a high out of spectacular workout (I’m thinking of a Navy friend in particular right now who reminds me of a black Hercules). Trust me, not everyone does. I equivocate working out to going to the doctor. Sure it’s a necessity that gives me piece of mind but it’s the completion of the act that gives me satisfaction, not the journey. So if we follow “skinny logic” not only must a person deprive their body of calories enough to drop weight but also use any energy left from the caloric drain to perform weary tasks of fitness. Well this just doesn’t seem very fair.

Now that we’re hungry and exhausted we need to concentrate on taking better care of ourselves. What exactly does this mean? Shall we now further enhance our daily rituals so that we have perfect hair, the whitest teeth, and the best fashion accessories? I’m guessing a regiment of several daily showers will be in order since all the exercise and dying fat cells will probably create quite the stink. Maybe we should take vitamins; because nothing
makes an empty stomach feel quite as soothed as a mass of “daily values” filling the space. I’ve been told that drinking quarts and quarts of water makes good sense for your skin. Of course that only brings back memories of the laying in my Army cot jiggling my hungry stomach (recently filled with forced hydration) to hear the fun, sloshy noises. Sure my skin looked great but I had to pee more than a pregnant woman on blood pressure medicine.

None of this sounds like fun right? Well this is what we expect from these beautiful women. In order for them to appear acceptable to the rest of us we want them to endure torturous acts of self-degradation and esteem-busting trials. For what? Other than the desire to fit in are they really unhappy about their weight? Maybe some. Maybe those who are hindered by resultant medical or personal issues; but I’m not talking about those. I’m referring to your average girl-next-door who happens to weight 160 at 5 feet. Sure, she’s got a pretty face but she could really stand to lose a few pounds. And to that I say… Bullshit!

Ladies you should be happy about being a BBW. If you are healthy and can get around without problems then there is nothing wrong with you. There are a million things that are great about being a desirable voluptuous woman. At the top of my list are:

•You are a lot more cuddly than skinny chicks and making love to you is way better. I don’t have to worry about getting a rash from friction and I don’t have to worry about the neighbors calling in the sound of bucks rutting next door.
•You have CURVES. Real guys love curves! I have no desire to sleep with a 10 year old boy and you shouldn’t want to be with someone who has that kind of sickness. Chances are with increased weight your breasts have grown as well. Kudos! You may now join the “more than a handful” club
•Sex aside for a moment…. You are well fed. You are not in need. You are not starving. You have enough food to make you happy. This is good!
•Your face looks better. Sunken cheeks are sickly and strong jaw bones are for male soap stars.
•Your female parts are tighter. I’m not using any research to back this up. Check it out for yourself. I’m not a doctor so I can’t give you the medical reason why this is true but… well there you have it.
•If you have a healthy weight (and not what society says is healthy) you are no more prone to health problems than a skinny chick.
•You are most likely better at fellatio. While most see this as a negative stereotype, comparing the deed to shoveling food in a greedy mouth, there is actually scientific backing to this statement. Again, I have no interest in doing your research for you. Google it when you get the time. It’s out there.
•Your most likely have some great leg muscles. I’ll let you think of why this could be a good thing but let me give you a hint; Kama Sutra.

Some may find me shallow for listing mostly sexual aspects of why it’s good to be a BBW. I can only rationalize that I am writing from a man’s point of view, and we are visual, sexual creatures after all. There is much more to you than just your body, but the same may be said for all women.

The short of my rant is that if you are a BBW and have no desire to diet, work out, or change your appearance to suit others then please adjust your perception. This last statement is negated if you are experiences health problems because of it. You are beautiful just the way you are. Be proud of your curves. Be excited that men find you exciting (because they do). If you don’t think men are looking at you because of your weight well, trust me it’s not your size. Lose the hang up on the “fat focus” so you can see the real hurdle. Maybe you’re just trying to impress losers. Maybe you go after the wrong type of man. Heck.... maybe you’re just not a good person.

Regardless of whatever hang-up you have (we all have them) do not let your weight stand in the way. If you’re big and beautiful those two things go happily hand in hand. Don’t just be big. Choose to be both and magically you will be. You are sensual. You are vital to this world. Remember beautiful, voluptuous women have been celebrated in art for as long as art has been expressed. You are a Big Beautiful Woman and you should be proud of it.

I just wanted to share a quick link to a webpage I created chronicling the conversations between myself and the “support” team at InfoWorks Technology.  I don’t believe I’m overreacting when I say that their customer skills are lacking at best.  If you enjoy a good tragedy I’m sure you’ll love the contents.

http://www.morsefam.us/infoworkscanbiteme.html

Today I looked and was stoked to see that I have received over 3,000 page views on my DeviantArt portfolio.  I know it may seem small potatoes to some of those nationally known photog celebs out there but I feel pretty good about it.  While my images have gotten over 8,000 views and I've received over 400 favorites, it's really the page views that excited me because that means I've interested someone in my work enough to slide on over and check me out.  To me it means.... well... bottom line is I feel like I'm moving in the right direction... and that's an AWESOME discovery.

Do I do what I do for the praise?  Maybe somewhat.  Everyone wants to be accepted in one form or another.  The driving force for me is the passion involved.  I love taking intimate, meaningful pictures but most of all... I like people to feel as beautiful as they look.  It's the biggest rush for me when we reach the part of the shoot where the transition of awkward positioning makes way for internal recognition of feeling sexy.  Inhibitions are put aside and the cocoon opens to reveal the butterfly.  The eyes change, the posing becomes more natural and you can see them realize they are beautiful, worthwhile and desired.

But the next step is almost as exciting.  When the model sees the final work you can tell they look as sexy and important as they felt when they were taking the pictures.  They're posture changes, their eyes smile and you can see their esteem grow in front of you.

Then the last step of seeing mutual artists understand and appreciate the journey by admiring your work.  Just a simple favorite of a picture makes you smile but then the comments come and you realize that, although everyone tends to see things a bit differently, they can see what you were trying to bring to the table.... and they like it, sometimes love it.  The last step is not the goal but it does help to keep you going.  It encourages you to continue the quest for great images.  You feel like your making a connection and that's a good feeling.

After all... isn't that the purpose of art?  What more can you ask for than to communicate through these means and be rewarded with some kind of connection... a piece of understanding between your peers.  It won't always happen.

But it's magical when it does!