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lonestarwolf's blog: "My Blog"

created on 01/31/2007  |  http://fubar.com/my-blog/b50369

Phantoms

Deep within a dark night of unrestful slumber. I wander down halls that I haven't seen in many years. Lost and confused I turn from this hall to the next wondering why I am here, seeing phantoms from my past. I hear laughter coming from around the bend; I peer around the corner and spy shadowy figures from my past. I stare as two kids share candy, sitting alone on a playground. I watch as they grow to teens, sharing a soda in the school cafeteria. I watch as they hold hands walking under the bleachers at a football game. I stare in disbelief as he took her home one evening after school, and sat on her couch sharing another soda and a kiss. And then, gone, ripped away from each other by a pain that was unending. I stare, unable to take my eyes away from the pain unfolding. I stare into eyes that I havenít seen in ages, longing for those lips I can never kiss again. Why did she lie to me, tell me she loved me and then walk away like I was nothing. And I watch as these feelings submerge deep into the chasm that is my heart. And then recent shadows, a longing never fulfilled, returning and leaving all almost in the same breath. I see eyes walking in, turning my heart upside down again and then leaving again, all too soon, as the chasm in my chest gets deeper and deeper. Dark is the depths of my heart, feeling empty, and lost as I watch more unfold. I feel my face, damp is the cheeks of my hollow eyes; I turn and see my face in the mirror. I am but a shadow of who I once was. Despair and pain are my companions now.
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