Over 16,529,262 people are on fubar.
What are you waiting for?

paying my respects

For those of you that know me you'll understand but this is a warning... For those who dont this is a slight look into a very private space in my heart... The following is a writting I had to do for my Creative Writting course... The most prominate life changing even in my life... Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting My husband of 5 years, died 2 years ago. He was a US Marine, had been injured in an exercise, and he passed away from complications in his sleep November 25 2004. It was Thanksgiving morning, and I had been awakened by my alarm, I remember it had been set at 6:30 a.m so that we could get the turkey in the oven. I got up and turned on the light, and I proceeded to attempt to wake Dan. I remember noticing how blue his lips were, then it hit me, he wasn't breathing. I started screaming at him, shaking him, trying everything I could to wake him up, I even slapped him. I was beside myself, my brain wasn't functioning. It was about 10-15 minutes after I found him that I even called 911… People think that in the face of something like this that you will play by all the rules, follow some unwritten handbook, but it doesn't happen like that, you really forget even the most basic of things. I remember the operators name and her tone of voice so vividly. Bridgett, and she was so kind, so calm. She had me check if he was breathing and then for a pulse, then she told me to proceed with CPR. I couldn't remember how, it was like I had forgotten everything I knew, but she walked me thru it. I remember the sounds, still even after 2 years, and they ring in my ears. It was so horrible, every time I would breathe for him it was this raspy, gurgling sound. And when Bridgett asked what I was experiencing and I told her, I remember she just sighed and told me to go down and wait for the paramedics. She stayed on the phone with me till they got there and once they did she told me I would be in good hands, and to remember it wasn't my fault, I had done everything I could do, then she hung up. I never dawned on me what she was talking about until much later. When the paramedics got to my house there were 2 ambulances, a fly car and 2 cop cars, 11 people in all rushed into my house and into my bedroom. While the cop was talking to me just making a report and trying to keep me calm, I was seeing what seemed like all of the people that had just gone in my house coming out, and they were saying "I'm sorry". I freaked and ran in my house and tried to go into my room, but the officer wouldn't let me. He asked me to sit down, then I heard it… "I'm sorry Ms. Corey, but your husband didn't make it. There was nothing that could be done, he was gone before the paramedics even got here, probably before you ever found him. Is there anything I can do for you? Anyone I can call? I was numb couldn't think. I had him call Dan's commanding officer and our priest. I then called my mom, and his, and my best friend. It wasn't until after the calls had been made and his commander, his 3 best friends who were also his battle buddies and their Doc got to the house that I completely lost it. I remember Doc went into the room and busted out his kit, he tried even though the paramedics that were still there told him nothing could be done. They just didn't understand the military ways or the bond. Kline, Dan's commander went up in our daughter's room and just held her, while OX, Bull and Bear (Dan's buddies) sat holding me up. Dan's mom got there with his Aunt, sister and brother, then my mom got there , she took Kayla (our daughter) from Kline and set about doing the grandmother thing, she was at a loss and that was the only thing she could think to do. I remember Kline went into my room and he was the only one who could get Doc to stop. I remember Doc said to me I tried, Kimy I tried, I just looked at him and said Doc I know you did, I know you did. When my best friend got there, I just looked at her, "Tiya" I said and that was all, she sat down and we just held each other. OX, Bull and Bear went and payed their respect, the house was quiet except for sobs, then all you heard was OORAH!!! I couldn't help but giggle through my tears, "those are my boys" I said to Tiya. It was sometime around noon when the coroner got there, the officer and Kline explained to me that it was a holiday so that’s why it took so long. Everyone started going in and saying their goodbyes, then the examiner had Kline take me in the kitchen, Tiya and Doc, OX, Bull and Bear stayed with me, but then Kline had the 4 of them join him and the examiner in the room. Again it's the military thing they take care of their own. The family was all in the kitchen, it was so overwhelming, all the sobs and everything. I looked at Tiya and her and I finally made our way into my room, it was the first time since 6:30 I had been allowed in it. Tiya held my and Kline rubbed my back as I sat down on the bed, I couldn't say anything, the tears were choking me, all I could do was look at him. In that minute I saw my entire life with him replay in my mind and I couldn't help but smile, then I leaned down and kissed him goodbye. OX had to practically carry me out of the room because that had taken everything out of me and my body was just shaking. He helped me to the kitchen and sat me down, he told Tiya not to let me watch them carry him out in the body bag, then he went back upstairs. Kline, Doc, OX, Bull and Bear, watched as the examiner did his evaluation, then they put their friend, partner, soldier in a body, took his dog tags from around his neck, said the Marine prayer for the fallen, zipped closed that bag and carried the love of my life out to the ambulance. I walked out on my porch just in time to see Doc close the door on the ambulance, and I remember the next 10 seconds like I remember yesterday, I put my hand over my heart, and said as loud as I could, God speed Lance Cpl Corey, Semper fi my love. Marine Prayer for the fallen "O Lord, we have long known that prayer should include confession. Therefore as Marines we confess their sins. Lord, they're just not in step with today's society. They are unreasonable in clinging to old-fashioned ideas like patriotism, duty, honor and country. They hold radical ideas believing that they are their brother's keeper and responsible for the Marine on their flank. They have been seen standing when colors pass, singing the National Anthem at ball games, and drinking toasts to fallen comrades. Not only that, they have been observed standing tall; taking charge and wearing their hair unfashionably short. They have taken Teddy R's and JFK's words too seriously and are overly concerned with what they can do for their service and country instead of what the country can do for them. They take the Pledge of Allegiance to heart and believe that their oath is to be honored. Forgive them, Lord, for being stubborn men and women who hold these values as genuine. They are aware of the price for honor and with total command of their spirit, they have been willing to pay that price. After all, what more can you expect? They're Marines! O Lord our God, bless these men and women of ideals, continue to raise up in this nation strong leaders and deliver us from "me first" managers and "don't ask me" followers. Be our honored guest this day, Oh Lord, and join with us in laughter, good food, good drink, and the telling of tall tales and legends that occasionally exceed the truth. We bow our heads to those who were lost in places that had names meaningless until the mud-Marines landed, and in that mud reaffirmed the one legacy that brings all Marines together, the blood and tears shed for service and each other. Watch over and keep safe all those who wear this nation's uniform with special attention to their families and loved ones everywhere. With brandy and cigar in hand, I salute you all for through this day and all the following nights and days ahead, God bless you, God Bless this great nation and God bless the Corps. Marine Prayer Almighty Father , whose command is over all and whose love never fails, make me aware of Thy presence and obedient to Thy will. Keep me true to my best self, guarding me against dishonesty in purpose and deed and helping me to live so that I can face my fellow Marines, my loved ones and Thee without shame or fear. Protect my family. Give me the will to do the work of a Marine and to accept my share of responsibilities with vigor and enthusiasm. Grant me the courage to be proficient in my daily performance. Keep me loyal and faithful to my superiors and to the duties my country and the Marine Corps have entrusted to me. Make me considerate of those committed to my leadership. Help me to wear my uniform with dignity, and let it remind me daily of the traditions which I must uphold. If I am inclined to doubt, steady my faith; if I am tempted, make me strong to resist; if I should miss the mark, give me courage to try again. Guide me with the light of truth and grant me wisdom by which I may understand the answer to my prayer. Yellow Ribbon Greetings-Patriotic & Military greeting cards

last post
17 years ago
posts
1
views
323
can view
everyone
can comment
everyone
atom/rss

other blogs by this author

 17 years ago
Last night
 17 years ago
AEROPOSTALE
 17 years ago
DISNEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 17 years ago
This weekend!!!!
 17 years ago
Baby
 17 years ago
Words unsaid
 17 years ago
Silly lil things
 17 years ago
EYES
official fubar blogs
 8 years ago
fubar news by babyjesus  
 13 years ago
fubar.com ideas! by babyjesus  
 10 years ago
fubar'd Official Wishli... by SCRAPPER  
 11 years ago
Word of Esix by esixfiddy  

discover blogs on fubar

blog.php' rendered in 0.0597 seconds on machine '110'.