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Current mood: sad Category: Romance and Relationships Everytime i get my heart broken, i still manage to be shocked... After it being broken so many times, you'd think i'd be used to it and be immune to certain things. But still as i stand here, once again heartbroken, i feel the rush of tears down my cheeks, dripping onto my shirt. I feel that dull but familiar burn and ache in my chest...... My mind at times racing with thoughts, no one should be forced to remember and at times blank as if my weary mind has just shut down...... And again i sit here wondering if it is all worth it..... Love that is.... Is going through all of this over and over trying to find the one person i'm suppose to be with, enduring heartbreak after heartbreak, worth the love i may one day find???? Even in the midst of everything i have to say...... YES If one didn't believe that love is worth the pain and heartache it takes finding it, why ever love at all????? As i close my eyes i imagine my idea of love...sweet kisses on my cheek, my eyes looking into his, as if no one on earth exists but us, my hand on his cheek, my lips touch his warm soft lips, my heart fluttering, light but full.... of ~LOVE~ *Patrice*

~Life Is Sweet~

Date: Mar 9, 2009 ~Life Is Sweet~ Current mood: thoughtful Category: Life The other day my daughter and i went out with some friends to finalize one of them's paperwork on a used car(a convertable) she was getting... I went along just thinking it would get me out of the house for awhile. I waited for an hour or so, acting my usual self in the parking lot(a big dork) just trying to make time go by faster.... listening to my mp3 player, talking alot, and raising a questioning eye to one the over zealous, over complimenting employees. Finally it was time to go, five of us in a convertable... lol all i could think was damn, i'm about to be a sardine all squished up in the back and in the middle lol... damn i cant wait to get home... those were the thoughts i had while climbling in the back. We all got in and off we went.... and immediately my attitude changed... sitting in the back of that car every problem or care i had seemed to melt away.. the further we went the better it got.... no longer did i care about being a sardine, or relationship problems, no longer did i care about bills or mean ass people that were previously in the back of my mind.... They seemed to fly out of my mind and behind me in the wind.... I remember sitting there thinking damn... this is sweet!!! At one point i remember putting my arms out on either side of my as if to fly, ignoring the faint giggles i heard on either side of me, wind in my hair and putting my face up to the heavens above, to feel the warm sunlight on my face.... It is definately one those moments you dont forget in your life.... although it may seem like a simple ride in a great car...... It reminded me of how sometimes life can just be so damn SWEET!!!!!! *Patrice*

~A Slut~ Thank You~

You called me a slut did you think i would cry did you expect to see tears in my eyes? Yes, i'm a slut i will not deny listen to me and i'll tell you why. I like young guys i dont like old men if your older than me you may not get in. I'm a woman who's not trying to get paid and i dont want your love i just want to get laid. I dont want your sweet words your promises and lies What i need is your hands on my thighs and your mouth on my skin like juliet said, give me my sin again. And after were done and your feet hit the floor dont look back get your ass out the door. So, when you call me a slut dont expect me to be sad or blue, i'll stand back and smile and say; thank you! ~Patrice~

~I Pretend~

Wednesday, July 23, 2008 Days go by and i havent heard from you....... Watching the clock, my phone, checking my messages......... Then finally i do......... And once again~ i pretend........ I fake a smile and put on a show......... I pretend i'm ok and everything's fine......... I pretend my heart doesnt ache for you every second of every day........ I pretend i'm happy for you and i'm moving on........ I pretend my heart isn't burning in my chest......... I pretend it doesnt hurt to hear you mention her......... I pretend i dont want those strong arms around me holding me tight........ I pretend its easy to fall asleep each and every night......... and as you walk away.......... my smile fades....... I fall to my knees and weep for you.......... until our paths cross again.......... and i pretend.......... ~Patrice~ ~For Tony~

Owned????? WTF?

People on this site crack me the fuck up. I mean this person owns that person and they seriously get on here and fight over each other! It's really fucking crazy. First of all, i am my own person and i would never want someone to own me. I as well wouldn't want to own anyone else. It's funny to me that they get on here though and seriously fight with each other about it! If you live in two different states, what the hell are you doing on here fighting over these men and women for? As if they are the only people on the planet or something? Hell you dont really know if these people are who and what they say they are! There is life beyond the computer people and some of you seriously need to chill and get up from behind your desk sometimes and go outside or to a club and meet someone new!!!!

~Me~

Just wanted to let everyone know how i'm doing. I realize it's been awhile since i've been on here, but alot has been happening... i recently broke up with my love of a year patt, and am single again... don't get me wrong, it's been hard but hopefully time will heal the hurt i'm feeling.... My best friend sean is my roomie now and we are living in an apt. in oklahoma until early summer when we hope to pack up and move to colorado... i'm wayyyy excited about this, since i've never lived anywhere but oklahoma. I have friends there i cant wait to see.... Anyway, just wanted to let you know i'm doing alright and hopefully you'll start seeing me on here again more often.. you can always email me or add me to your messenger.. i'm neomaoklahoma@yahoo.com...... i heart you all!!! ~Patrice~xoxo

~My Broken Heart~

~My Broken Heart~ Current mood: crushed Category: Writing and Poetry I'd never been so happy in my life You were my love Like a thief in the night You took your love from me And showered another With your love Now i lay here broken And so lost Tears have fallen from these eyes For the past 2 days My soul is screaming out for you I need my love! I will someone to come along with a knife And cut my broken heart out! I want it out! I want the pain, the burning to stop!!!! ~Patrice~

~Lost~

~Lost~ Current mood: drained Category: Writing and Poetry My mind is full and my body is weak So many tears shed for our love For so long now your love is all i've wanted or needed You completely surrounded me with your love And now i find myself empty...... lost...... The warmth of your love gone so fast For some reason i never imagined i would ever be without it As sure as the sun rises each day i was equally as confident of our love As i lay here.... lost... not knowing how to go on My mind remembers your sweet love Remembering is torture without you, i'm just lost ~Patrice~
~Something’s Different~ Current mood: "Peachy Baby" Category: "Peachy Baby" Writing and Poetry You say things are fine and god i hope thats true but, my heart can feel a difference your just not "you" The past few months with you have been a dream but are things with us exactly what they seem? Out of the blue, you found me sad and alone, you made me see how amazing your love could be You breathe the very life back into me My heart is on pause hoping we can make it through what lies ahead for me and you Weather were together or in time we part my love for you will remain forever in my heart ~Patrice~

~Memories Of You~

~Memories Of You~ Current mood: happy Category: Writing and Poetry Although we've moved on I want you to know You still cross my mind The sweet memory of our love Still makes me smile I was so in awe of you You took my breath away Without a doubt, your the most beautiful person My eyes have ever seen, these hands have ever touched Your soft sweet words and gentle touch opened my heart To a kind of love i'd never known And though we've moved on You will now and forever remain in my heart~ ~Patrice~
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