But that's different. That's cheating.
Precisely. If you want more than one lover--which most people do, in spite of the romantic myth you may have been brought up to believe--then integrity and decency demands that you be honest and up-- about it.
I've been approached and propositioned by women who have asked me, point-blank, "So, ould you ever cheat?" When I say "I am open to having other lovers, but I would never cheat--we can become lovers only if my partner approves" they usually freak out."Oh, that's just too weird"
So apparently there re a lot of people who are perfectly fine with lying and deception, who won't hesitate to betray their spouse and think nothing of it--but who can't accept the idea of integrity and honesty.
Those people aren't my lovers. Anyone who can betray their spouse can betray me as well, and I don't want people like that in my life.
So you're saying that everyone is either poly or cheating?
No. Some people seem ired for monogamy. They can stay in a monogamous relationship, and be happy, and never even look at another person. That's cool. But not everybody is like that; in fact, evidence suggests that most people are not.
Even that isn't hat matters, though. In the end, it's not about what is "enogh." Many poly people could be monogamous, if they really wanted to; in fact, people, who can sustain successful polyamorous relationships tend to be better at obeying the rules of a relationship, and not cheating, than average people. But poly people don't want monogamous relstionships.
