Angel's blog: "Outside looking in"

created on 09/28/2006 | http://fubar.com/outside-looking-in/b8001

posted on 05/06/2013&nbs-07:00;@&nbs-07:00;08:05&nbs-07:00;am

Fly high my Sweet-pea
http://fubar.com/fly-high-my-sweet-pea/b8001-1197696

On January 10,2013 our family welcomed into this world a beautiful baby girl named Audrey Olivia. She was born with Trisomy 13... Audrey was born with sever kidney problems and heart problems..On May 4, 2013 God came to get her...I can remember falling to my knees at her bedside crying I wanted to shout out ITS NOT FAIR!! But we knew from the get go that her life would be a short lived one. She was the light of my life. I have never really knew what love was until I became a grandma. Our lives have been turned upside down!! I keep asking myself, WHY HER????? My daughter and son in law are just so distraught over this, but yet have remained amazingly strong.You know, life prepares us to lose our parents and grandparents, but it never prepares us to lose a baby so young and so innocent. We didn't get the chance to love her fully like we should. Oh baby I'm misssing you so much today. I woke up with a heavy heart and tears in my eyes. I know you are here with us, but I just wished I had one more chance to hold you, one more chance to kiss your sweet face. This isn't how it's supposed to be!! I never got the chance to sit with you on the bench watching the dogs walk by, or listen to the birds sing, feeling the warmth of the sun on our faces. You are now free from all the tubes, free from all the pain you were in. Fly high my sweet-pea!! I miss you so much today! I hope you felt the love everyone had for you. Just remember, you are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you'll never know dear how much I love you, I know you are in a better place, but the pain of losing you will never end!! Oh how I miss you so much Audrey!! You are loved!! You are my angel!! Grandma misses you baby girl!!

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posted on 05/10/2008&nbs-07:00;@&nbs-07:00;08:05&nbs-07:00;pm

A poem from a friend of mine TY Lostpoet
http://fubar.com/a-poem-from-a-friend-of-mine-ty-lostpoet/b8001-786048

My friend Lostpoet wrote this beautiful poem for me. Thank you Lostpoet!!!! The Lady Soars with truth and Pride Stands up tall and strong She wont let no one hold her back No one will put her down With the Spirit of the Cheetah The courage of the Jaguar And the strength of the tiger inside This lady will shine like the stars above Singing her song for Peace and love She can dance upon the wind She can soar with the stars above She will rule now and forever With her kind and Gentle heart For as she Dances now with Pride she sings out strong and true Never holding back the dream Of finding love within For she sings out with the wind (Tony Kenyon 2008)

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posted on 03/21/2007&nbs-07:00;@&nbs-07:00;10:03&nbs-07:00;pm

Death threat??? This asshole is on CT..
http://fubar.com/death-threat-this-asshole-is-on-ct/b8001-277417

Last night, I had my cam on, yeah i do go on from time to time...Im in a group that requires you to have a cam..Now now now.....not all cam groups are like what your thinkin...Well, my cam froze, so i had to shut it off and this is the message I recieved! narutofiend2006 (3/21/2007 1:01:05 AM): why the fuck did u kick me Debbie myob (3/21/2007 1:01:19 AM): froze narutofiend2006 (3/21/2007 1:01:52 AM): ok reallow me then and don't let me miss ur cam narutofiend2006 (3/21/2007 1:02:10 AM): ............. narutofiend2006 (3/21/2007 1:02:17 AM): are u fucking kiddin me? narutofiend2006 (3/21/2007 1:02:44 AM): whatever think u're the coolest one but ur not u will regret this bye narutofiend2006 (3/21/2007 1:03:53 AM): die die bitch Yes this asshole is here on CT as well..All i can say is "dude fuckin build a bridge and freakin get over it"! I know its all just words, but some should just go unspoken!!

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posted on 12/13/2006&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;08:12&nbs-08:00;pm

happy freakin holidays!!!!
http://fubar.com/happy-freakin-holidays/b8001-129987

Ok now this was just too funny, yet frustrating!!! Being the holiday season and shit, I decided to "try" to build a gingerbread house with my daughter and my neice!!!! Now, bein a teacher and all you think i would have patience???? AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA AH HAHAHAHAHA OMG I was so wrong!!! We got the house put all together, icing and all, when all at once, the house started to slip, candy fallin everywhere, Girls gigglin, and yet there i stand with mouth open in total disbelief!!!! We had icing in our hair, on our clothes!!!! Shit it was stuck everywhere, I was gettin pissed because the FLIPPIN HOUSE WOULD NOT STAY TOGETHER!!!!! As I went to get a towel to wipe up the mess, guess who decided to jump on the chair and start licking off the table???? MY FLIPPIN DOG!!!! Now she has icing all over her fur..... Sad to say the gingerbread house didnt survive!!! Kids are now all on a sugar high, and im literally stuck with icing in my hair..... Asked if I would do it again???? Ummmmmmmmmmm HELL YAH!!!!

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posted on 12/06/2006&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;07:12&nbs-08:00;pm

Broken
http://fubar.com/broken/b8001-120002

Ok so here I sit on this stupid computer and listening to Scott Stapp....Then I hear this song, that just kinda sums things up for me. Alot has been changing here and it kinda left me with the feeling of What the fuck just happened???? Ever get that way? Its like just when you think things are at it worst, something new and exciting just pops up out of nowhere!! Well, I dont know why im writting a blog, since I never do..Things are just hard for me to get out...Well here is the song that just kinda seems to sums things up for me!! Why are we overcome with fear? What if I told you that fear isnt real! Why are we overcome with doubt? You could live without! Street corner preachers youve heard before Friendly advice just gets thrown out the door There is a question I want to understand Why cant everyone tell the truth and learn to love again Do you know what it feels like to be broken and used scared and confused yes i know One more question i know thime is clear is what the world speaks of love really real? the answers not of this world but very clear look above to fine love and youll find eternal life There is a question that i want to understand why cant everyone tell the truth and learn to love again Do you know what it feels like to be broken and used? scared and confused Do you know what it feels like to be broken and dused scared and confused yes i know what it feels like to be broken and used scared and confused yes i know.. Yeah i know this doesnt make much sense, but hell at the time it did to me. Things in my life look like its gonna turn for the better. Lord knows Ive been through hell and a hand basket, and now its MY TURN to be happy again damnit!!! LOL....

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posted on 12/02/2006&nbs-08:00;@&nbs-08:00;03:12&nbs-08:00;pm

Surround me
http://fubar.com/surround-me/b8001-113739

They say no man's an island but I tend to disagree. I guess they never seen my island. And where is lies at sea. I'm lost inside my memory. I'm still in disbelief. If I could paint a picture for you this is what you'd see.... I'm down on my knees beggin you to rescue me... please stop me.... surround me... surround me...now A wounded man sounds desperate when he's lost all his belief... Can you look into my eyes and say you won't betray me... Where running out of time.. how precious time can be... Im counting all the moments of the times you could have helped me.. I'm down on my knees beggin you to rescue me... please stop me.... surround me... surround me... I'm down on my knees beggin you to rescue me... please stop me.... surround me... surround me... ~scott stapp~ The great Divide..... This song describes be perfectly!!!!!

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Angel