Chris The Dealer's blog: "OTHER PEOPLE OTHER THINGS"

I was driving through Santa Ana and stopped at a liquor store to buy a bottle of ice tea. An old, drunk wino stood at the checkout stand and was attempting to purchase of a pint of vodka. He had laid all his money on the counter and stood silently as the Asian proprietor, with one hand on the bottle, counted the change. "You twenty-seven cents short," the proprietor said. The wino reached into his pocket but came up empty. The look of disappointment on his face was heartbreaking. "I have a little spare change," I said, and threw down a couple of quarters. The proprietor bagged up the bottle and put the money into the drawer. The wino turned to me and said, "Thank you, Sir. You must be a Christian."

I shall wrap myself in the flag of my country and hold high a bible in my hand. My songs of reverence and righteousness will be heard throughout the land. I will align myself with those of power and wealth, forsaking the downtrodden and unfortunate and proclaim my actions to be in the best interest of all. Because the uneducated and ignorant are more easily governed, I will divert funding from the education of our youth, saying to my critics that our children will be given the care that they require. I will repeal legislation that protects the citizenry from environmental pollution and deny their right to judicial process. And I will say that it is necessary for the common good. I will invade foreign powers, categorizing them as evil, and imprison and torture their people. And this, I will say, is justified in that we bring hope, freedom and democracy to the conquered. I will take from the impoverished, the elderly and the infirmed and they will believe that this is right and good. For it is by their faith rather than their understanding that I have been entrusted with the power to lead them, and they will not readily admit the fallibility of their beliefs. Let us pray.

Spend all your time waiting for that second chance for a break that would make it okay there's always one reason to feel not good enough and it's hard at the end of the day I need some distraction oh beautiful release memory seeps from my veins let me be empty and weightless and maybe I'll find some peace tonight in the arms of an angel fly away from here from this dark cold hotel room and the endlessness that you fear you are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie you're in the arms of the angel may you find some comfort there so tired of the straight line and everywhere you turn there's vultures and thieves at your back and the storm keeps on twisting you keep on building the lie that you make up for all that you lack it don't make no difference escaping one last time it's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees in the arms of an angel fly away from here from this dark cold hotel room and the endlessness that you fear you are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie you're in the arms of the angel may you find some comfort there you're in the arms of the angel may you find some comfort here - Sarah McLachlan

Our Father, we thank thee for the many blessings thou hast bestowed upon us and we rejoice in bounty of which we are about to partake. We ask thy blessing upon those less fortunate and those who have given of themselves in order that we might live in a land of freedom and prosperity. We ask that you give comfort to those who are in torment as a result of their public service, selflessness and benevolence - Tom Delay, who faces money laundering charges; Scooter Libby, looking at thirty years; and Jack Abramoff who bilked the Indians out of sixty million or so - maybe eighty million, and then referred to them as monkeys, troglodytes and idiots. May you bless Michael Scanlon, aide to Mr. Abramoff, who took a plea bargain and agreed to testify against Jack. And we ask, O Lord, that you keep watch over Karl Rove (Turd Blossom) and that you protect him against charges of perjury and treason. And Dick Cheney, the prophet of torture, may you protect him from the slings and arrows of the law. And we ask your blessing upon George Bush. May you give him divine guidance and wisdom that he may better rule the servants who voted for him - a man who says that there is no higher calling than service to ones country; a man who deprived veterans of the benefits they were guaranteed at the time of induction, a man who diverted funds to finance the bombing of Iraq before receiving congressional approval and who killed 100,000 Iraqi civilians, a man who manipulated intelligence reports, lied to the United Nations, lied to congress and lied to the citizens of his country to justify the invasion of a sovereign nation without provocation. Yes Lord, we ask your blessing upon him or your forgiveness, whichever comes first. Surely these are good Christians and deserving of thy grace. Oh yeah, and if it's not too much trouble - maybe you could do a little something for the homeless, or our military personnel who have been issued sub-standard body armor, or for the wounded veterans who are being billed for their food while recovering from battle wounds in a hospital and who, as disabled veterans, will be relegated to the bottom of the economic scrap heap like disposable diapers. And maybe you could do something for the malnourished children who live in poverty, and for the elderly who must choose between medicine, food and heating their homes this winter. Well, if it's not too much trouble, maybe you could do something about those things too. Yeah, I know that's a lot to ask. I'd help if I could. Happy Thanksgiving. Amen.

Author/journalist, Hunter S. Thompson, who was brilliantly portrayed by Johnny Depp in the film Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas, died in his Colorado home on February 20, 2005 from a self-inflicted gunshot. Despite his appetite for hallucinogenic drugs and radical behavior, Thompson was a thinker and a damn good writer, and his passing is a loss to the world. Thompson, in his last will and testament, requested that upon his death, his body be shot from a cannon. This presents two fundamental problems; 1) finding a cannon large enough to hold his remains, and 2) dealing with the resulting biohazard and environmental issues. After some thought into the matter, I have developed the following solution: Battle ship cannons would be of sufficient size to stuff a human body down the tube. It may be possible to mount one of these guns on the Chevron oil tanker, the Condoleezza Rice. Thompson, a staunch democrat, would no doubt be amused with the irony of being shot out of artillery from the deck of this particular vessel. If the tanker could be maneuvered into the great lakes of the north eastern United States, it would then be possible to shoot his remains into Cleveland where toxic waste and bio-hazardous materials have never been of much concern except for that time when Lake Erie caught on fire. Thompson, it is presumed, would approve of being blasted over the residents of Ohio, a swing state that went republican in the last two presidential elections. As compensation to Chevron for participating in the tribute to Thompson, the Condoleezza Rice would be granted special privilege to dump its bilge into Lake Erie, thus enabling the company to avoid the costly regulations and procedures involved with such an operation. In conclusion, the above proposal would be a fitting send-off to a great American and provide benefit to all involved parties, except for the residents of Cleveland who wouldnt know the difference anyway.