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Jake from State Farm's blog: "Nowadays"

created on 07/09/2007  |  http://fubar.com/nowadays/b100448

(Note: I’m a teenager and doing Girl Scout fund raising by bagging at a local grocery store. All the other lanes had baggers, leaving me at self-check out. A customer notices me reaching for his items.)

Customer: “I… uh… please… uh… DON’T!”

(I notice his purchase consists of condoms, roses, and chocolates.)

Me: “Oh! So, anniversary, or did you just piss her off?”

Customer: “The second.”

Me: “That bad, eh?”

Customer: “Yeah, and she hasn’t given me any since! What kind of bulls*** is that?”

Me: “When did this start happening?”

Customer: “Like a week ago! I don’t even know what I did wrong!”

Me: “Don’t you think it’s a bit early for these?” *holds up the box of condoms*

Customer: *sarcastically* “What would a Girl Scout know anyways? Since you’re the expert, why don’t you tell me what to do?”

(I talk to the guy for around 15 minutes and he leaves. The next week, he comes in while I’m bagging as usual. Without a word, he comes up to me, hands me a $20 bill and leaves without buying anything.)

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