SoMe Goddamn One's blog: "NEWSFLASH!!! ...2!!!"

*Blows the cobwebs off the desk*.... well.... it has been a long time coming but I'm back... fer now NEWSFLASH 8:38 PM: I be dyin muh hairz! NEWSFLASH 8:59 PM: I be buyin da wrong dyez!

Good afternoon faithful readers!!!...and hello to all the rest of you fools. We are currently working on some form of news ticker to put up whereever you like. As of yet, no luck. NEWSFLASH 8:25 PM: s'wet out there (O.O) NEWSFLASH 9:41 PM: because seem to get more readers when I post a new post on a blog, starting tomorrow, NEWSFLASHes will be posted on a new blog every day (still may change my mind on this) and a new post for each update (will happen) NEWSFLASH 10:07 PM: FFS! call the Orkin man! Ihe roaches have aquired semiautos!

ferrets attacking... cant ... report... news... must... fight them off... check back... NEWSFLAH 11:51 pm: AGGH!!! GET IT OFF ME!!! -,=,^*< O,O

And now to Binky for the weather, Binky? ... Thank you Binky. In further news, recent discoveries in the Nile River Valley have proven that crocodile dung was used as a contraceptive by Egyptians circa 2000 B.C.(Just incase they sell out of Trojans) ...however... THIS DOES NOT MEAN IT ACTUALY WORKS!!! (The staff at newsflash is not responsible for any babies produced because of this broadcast.) NEWSFLASH 7:25 PM: I have a lack of readers... *pulls three sugar gliders out of my pocket* GO FORTH MY MINIONS AND BRING BACK READERS! NEWSFLASH 9:28 PM: ''''-._.-'''' < I are moose! YAY!

Back by unpopular demand... NEWSFLASH!!! Yes its been a while I know, but I have recently gotten a new staff of ferrets and we are ready to go at it again. Our HQ is now located in Hellbillys Hideout, with offices in Snake Eyes Radio. If your lounge would like a NEWSFLASH office please notify me... I'll think about it. This time I will be doing something a little different, there will be advertising! NEWSFLASH 12:47 PM: *Walks in, dusts the cobwebs off the ol' news desk and turns the coffee pot on* NEWSFLASH 12:49 PM: Studies show that a ball of glass will bounce higher than a ball made of rubber. Studies also show that a ball of glass will do more damage when hurled at a window than a ball made of rubber. And while we are on the subject studies show that old peepulz get pissy when you break their windows with glass balls. NEWSFLASH 12:52 PM: For those of you who haven't figured it out ... yes... I am opperating on central standard time. NEWSFLASH 1:16 PM: Cats sleep 16 to 18 hours per day ... fuckin workahaulics NEWSFLASH 10:54 PM: The surface area of an average-sized brick is 79 cm squared and they hurt when flung at your head. NEWSFLASH 11:02 PM: Rumor has it that the apollo moon landing photos were not, as once thought, taken in the New Mexico desert but rather taken on the moon. We at NEWSFLASH still arent at convinced.