Ahwatukee CoCo's blog: "Changes"

So tired lately no matter how much sleep, rest, relasation I get. I'm still so tired. My skin is changing again not so bad this time don't have the dark patches least not yet don't want to get them again to me they are so ugly. Make me look scaley don't like that but not like I can stop it from coming just try to cope with it. Skin feels so dry no matter how much water I drink how much H2O, hydration is received. Change my lotions again, this one seems to work better but I still like the body butters I still like the ones with the sweet smells. My skin feels so soft after rubbing it on but its only temporary. But I like the smells of the strawberry mango, lavender, cucumber melon, orange truffle yes the sweet smells of deserts a delicious treat. Woke up the other day cleared my throat and spit out a wad of blood it was like I spit out a scab or something. Then I had to deal with a nose bleed. Bright red blood just wouldn't stop so I just plugged nose with tissue and tried to get ready for work. Still gotta go getting to hot to b homeless. Now when I get up my legs hurt. One is swollen opposite side of my fat hand. Its the leg with the rod in it but I don't think its the rod that is causing the swelling.

Still little swollen today u can c it well I can cuz I no my body but most people won't notice. For now the doctor doesn't think its a big deal but he monitors all the other things like my new growths an my blood count and how my heart is doing. Yeah strong meds takes a toll on my heart it actually impairs its function. Have to do a heart scan in a few months. Usually do that bout every 6 months yea the wonders of modern meds and the wonders of the side effects. My hair is hurting again. Yes it seems like my scalp is so sensitive that I can feel every hair that is growing n it. Its starting 2 shed too. I see it n the shower and now I see it on my pillow. Thats new to me didnt have that the last time. This time I have a lot of different things going on. I have scratches dont know how they get there I go to sleep n wake up all scratched up. Really don't notice till I shower and the water hits them n they burn. Maybe nutha side effect I don't know. Now i'm gonna rest again. Getting tired again. I slept most of the night and most of the morning it is now afternoon...no one knows what I am going thru I just laugh and smile as if nothing is going on. I keep it from my family and friends I don't want them to worry I don't think they would really be able to handle this. I think it's best that I do it this way. I just tell them bits n pieces the good parts of the doctors reports but sometimes I think they know better but they don't say anything they don't push me....