This is a rant from 10/11/06 actually used it in a stand up routine during open mic nite...fun stuff
That's right folks Kim Jong Il and his cabbage patch crew have threatened war on the United States. After I got done laughing for three hours I decided to sit down and examine this whole goofy scenario. First off N Korea is maybe the size of Deleware so the idea of them making a threat like that is hilarious. 2nd and this is the big part if they do declare war on us we just need to send in the population of Vermont and all of a sudden Korea turns into the United States Of Seoul. Sure they have been spouting off about Nuclear weapons testing and all that bullshit but the fact is this N Korea doesnt have a missile in its arsenal that could even come close to the US. I say fuck em He wants war I say we drop one of those 20 ton bunker buster bombs on PyongYang. Hell if it could take out Saddam's kids it could sure as fuck take out that kimchi eating lunatic.Of course it will never happen he's just spouting bullshit to rally his dog eating troops. And Thats the problem with dictators they are all talk but no show. When it comes time to throwdown they run like hell. Lets not forget we captured Mister Saddam " We will crush your skulls and drink your blood" Hussein hiding in a friggin hole. If you are a dictator dont give us this "we will squash you and steal your souls" bullshit because you know as well as we do that you're going to get your ass handed to you. Oooh heres a great idea! So Koreans eat dog...its part of the menu and apparently they like it. Fuck Kim Jong Il he wants to threaten war I say we send in all the pissed off Peta members. That way not only do we get rid of Kim Jong Il and his kimchi crew but we also get rid of PETA...HA love it. Anyway fuck you N Korea Im out!