Over 16,525,990 people are on fubar.
What are you waiting for?
Such a wonderful hour sometimes. Your asleep finally having that dream, finally resting, feeling nice and cozy, but at work u dont let your self get to comfortable so u dont sleep deep. Then BAM the alarm goes off so loud it makes your heart jump and your toes curl at first, then your adrenaline pumps. You have exactly 1 min to wake up 2 mins to be moving by the 3rd you better be on the road......
Fuckin just love 3am....
Well for few days now i have been able to sleep with out being woken by the screams of others in my mind. Is a strange feeling waking up to screaming that u think u hear, sounds so real.... But then u look around its not there and it as just another dream... The dr says i need pills, i say he is just a pussy.
So out of no were you find yourself falling asleep and bam....
You see the faces, demons that rest on your shoulders they dont say anything you just see them. you wake up so freaked out that u dunno what to do almost like you been drugged your body wont move.......
When well they go away
So today was a good day didnt see much to remind me of the bad things that i see on a daily basis.... Kinda nice, the air was fresh with smog of course, the smell of rain but of course no rain. Tonight spent some quality time with my boys at a video arcade something about being able to blow shit up and shoot random things kinda makes u feel better....
Well laid down tonight with the idea i was going to sleep.. yea not so much, I started thinking about all the experiences i have had. past and present with work and such... How do u erase a face from your mind and let go of things...?
Have u ever watched someone choke on there own blood? Looking at u gasping for air, blood running down there body and yours, doing what u can with what you have, all the noise and movement around stops and all your focus feels like your in slow motion, u feel the sweat dripping from your body, your eyes fixed on there eyes as u do what u can. But in the end everything u did sometimes is not enough to keep this child alive. people tell u u did what u could, but u wanted more. You hear the voices all around you, the screams of on lookers, the horror repeats its self everytime u close your eyes. You see there face everytime u close your eyes.
Welcome to my fucked up world
