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The issues on your subconscious mind are most affecting your: Love Life Whether you're in a committed partnership, you're casually dating, or you're single, your love life revolves around your romantic hopes and needs. Perhaps your conscious mind is aware that something is troubling you with regard to it or maybe you just have a vague sense that things don't feel quite right. However tuned in you are to your feelings about your love life, you most likely have deeper issues that affect how you are subconsciously viewing your circumstances. Some issues are isolated to one realm of life, but generally an issue affects several areas at once, and to varying degrees. Your subconscious mind could be preoccupied with your love life because of a wide variety of issues you aren't aware of. The following are some pretty common ones that people have around love. Do any resonate with you? Worrying that you aren't doing a good enough job in your love life. You might feel like you can't adequately meet the needs of a partner, or that you aren't giving enough. Worrying that you aren't doing your best. You might feel that your love life isn't yet complete or satisfying. Perhaps your romantic relationships don't possess the intimacy and connection you feel you're capable of engaging in. Worrying that you'll be betrayed. Especially if you've experienced difficulties in your past, you may subconsciously worry that a lover will betray you. Or perhaps you're concerned that you aren't capable of being faithful or committed. Worrying that you'll be rejected. When unchecked, this common fear can make you overly self-protective, which can make it difficult to relax in your romantic relationships. Wishing you didn't make things so complicated. You might feel that your love life is overly structured, and you may subconsciously wish there were more flexibility to relate freely with your romantic partner. Did any of the issues you just read sound familiar? Once you recognize your subconscious concerns, you'll most likely be better able to find resolution. Follow the steps below and get in touch! 1. Begin writing a list of issues you think might be affecting you in the area of your life that is experiencing some trouble. 2. Consider your scores on the core issues discussed in the "Issues impacting your subconscious" section. Did you score high on any that are affecting the challenging area of your life? 3. Choose one issue to focus on. 4. Bring the issue into your conscious mind in a variety of ways. Leave a note on your bathroom mirror to remind yourself; meditate on where the issue came from and how it impacts your life; talk about it with a friend or partner. 5. In a month or two, ask yourself how/if this issue is still impacting your life in that one area, and then consider whether it's been resolved in all areas of your life. If it still seems like the issue is affecting your well-being, you may want to enlist the help of a therapist. Once everything has shifted for the better, you may want to use the same techniques on other issues. What's on your subconscious mind Your subconscious take Issues impacting your subconscious Mysteries of the subconscious mind Tapping into your subconscious History behind the test Further reading Though your subconscious mind is currently most preoccupied with your Love Life, there are actually seven additional realms of life it contends with. In this section, you'll find out how your other realms are impacted by learning what your relatively high or low score in that area means. A real-life example is provided to illustrate the impact certain issues can have on your life and the techniques that can be used to resolve them. You'll find more step-by-step details about how to employ these techniques yourself in the "Tapping into Your Subconscious" section. Love Financial Sex Health Personal growth Work Friendships Family low high Love Realm Love low high You scored 62 on the love life scale. Your love life revolves around your romantic partners. Whether you have a committed partnership, you're casually dating, or you're single without prospects, your love life concerns your romantic hopes and needs. Your relatively high score indicates that the circumstances surrounding your love life are taking up a lot of your subconscious energy. Perhaps you're longing for a jumpstart, whether that means a new sweetheart or some quality time with your current partner. Or maybe you're experiencing some kind of change, and it is emotionally draining. For whatever reason, some aspect of your love life may be dissatisfying and this is making you preoccupied. It's no wonder that most of the songs on the radio are about love — it's a complex, yet marvelous thing we are always trying to understand better. Take Beth, for example: She worked incredibly long hours, and blamed her nonexistent love life on this. While her friends offered to set her up, she always made the excuse that she didn't have time. The interesting thing was that Beth's performance at work was starting to slip. Even her boss suggested she take a bit of time off. Beth couldn't figure out what was happening, because she was actually very happy with her job, even though she could see from time to time that she might be taking her commitment to it a bit too far. What she didn't know was that her subconscious mind was actually worrying over her love life, specifically around her fears of betrayal. Her last relationship had ended with a nasty breakup that involved infidelity, and ever since Beth had immersed herself in her career to avoid facing her feelings about that betrayal. Though this issue affected other areas of Beth's life, she was particularly worried that she'd again be betrayed by a romantic partner. This fear was causing Beth to feel distracted at work, leading to mistakes that she'd never made in the past. By identifying that it was in fact her subconscious issues around betrayal that were taking up so much of her mental space, she found she was able to focus on and face up to this issue. Eventually, she found that she was able to work fewer hours and still excel at her job. She used her extra time to start pursuing a more fulfilling love life. Financial Realm Financial low high You scored 38 on the financial scale. Your finances involve everything having to do with money: your bank account balance, your debts, and your investments. Believe it or not, many of your financial hopes and fears can impact your subconscious mind. Aside from money being necessary to take care of yourself, it has also always been assigned a certain status in our lives, and this can be stressful. Take Jake, for instance. He had a good job that had brought home a big paycheck for many years, though he was thousands of dollars in debt, and he had little savings to speak of. He always made excuses for why the state of his finances was so bad: He lived in an expensive city, he was still paying off student loans, and he was still just getting off the ground in his job. But when even his friends who made less money than he started talking about buying homes, he started realizing that he was in terrible financial shape. What was really holding him back if it wasn't the amount of money he was bringing home? He started doing freewriting, not just about his finances, but about where he was in life in general. After some practice, he discovered that he actually had a deep fear that he wasn't living up to his potential. This seemed to impact many aspects of his life, including his finances. By making his subconscious fear conscious, he was able to set more concrete goals, including a budget. Sex Realm Sex low high You scored 18 on the sex life scale. Your sex life is made up of all of your sexual experiences, past and present. It includes all of your sexual desires, fears, and fantasies. Your test results indicate that your subconscious is relatively free of preoccupations about your sex life. Those who score high in this realm wish their sex lives were more satisfying. Others worry that they're not good enough in bed. For whatever reason, their subconscious minds are preoccupied with thoughts and feelings about their sex lives. You, on the other hand, seem to be satisfied with your sex life. You would think that this area of our lives would get easier as we matured — not necessarily. Take Graham, for example: He was finding that he wasn't enjoying his sex life as much as he had in the past. Although he was attracted to his new partner, he found himself avoiding sex for the first time in his life. He claimed he was tired, or at least he thought that must be the problem. He blamed work and the weather and just about anything else he could think of, but inside he felt troubled. When he and his partner did have sex, he couldn't shut his mind off, and he found himself worrying over a bunch of little things, including whether or not his partner could tell that he was distracted. Finally, after trying self-hypnosis, Graham discovered that he had an issue around not being good enough in bed. His worries about not being able to adequately please his new partner — who had a good deal more experience than he did — were taking away his pleasure and excitement. With the help of his partner, he worked through this fear and was finally able to relax during sex, and both of them enjoyed themselves more. Health Realm Health low high You scored 18 on the health scale. The condition of your health impacts you on a daily basis, but is also responsible for how you experience nearly all aspects of life. Your past ailments, your present condition, and your general fears about your well-being are all a part of this realm. Your relatively low score in health indicates that this realm isn't preoccupying your subconscious mind all that much. If it were, you could expect to feel obsessed about your health, perhaps because of a chronic injury or illness. Many of those who score high in this realm worry that they aren't healthy enough. It could be that their personal or family medical histories are leading them to have these health concerns. Whatever it is, some aspect of their health is preoccupying their subconscious minds, whereas yours seems content with this realm of your life. What do we have without our health? Our health is extremely important to us and yet many of us live in denial and don't take care of ourselves. Take Stan, for example. He had always been a physically fit person. He'd read health magazines while running on the treadmill each night after work, and this was before he went to lift weights! His low-fat, low-carb, high protein special diet was so precise that he weighed his portions on a scale. He took tons of different vitamins and supplements each month, depending on what the magazines recommended. And then, one day, Stan stopped everything. He couldn't explain it, but all he wanted was to lie on the couch and eat pizza. This continued night after night after night. He was starting to consider canceling his gym membership. He knew his behavior was extreme, but he just couldn't do it all anymore. When he called to cancel his routine physical and didn't ask to reschedule, his doctor called him back with concern. She knew that Stan was a bit of a fitness extremist, and he never missed the opportunity to ask her health questions. Stan told her what was going on, and she suggested he see a therapist to get to the bottom of it. After several sessions with a therapist, which included hypnotherapy, Stan discovered that he was confronting his issues about making his life too complicated. For him, everything had always been an all or nothing proposition. With the help of therapy, Stan was able to work through his issues and find his way to a happier, healthier middle ground. Personal Growth Realm Personal growth low high You scored 16 on the personal growth scale. This is the area most related to your general hopes and aspirations about life. Your continued self-improvement in relationships, career, finances, and health, as well as your ability to identify and realize your life purpose, are all connected to your personal growth. Your test results indicate that your unconscious isn't concerned with your action around personal growth. Those who score high in this realm feel stuck in their lives, wondering what their next step should be. Many feel trapped, like they don't have the ingenuity to make a change. They may worry that they don't have enough time or energy to devote to improving themselves or developing your hobbies. For some reason or another, their subconscious is preoccupied with their lack of personal growth, whereas yours seems to be satisfied with this realm of your life. Taking time out for personal growth and improvement can seem impossible, even though we know that it's incredibly necessary to explore our curiosities. Take Jenny, for example — she was depressed. She felt stuck in just about every area of her life: She wasn't getting along well with her family, her love life was nonexistent, and her job paid poorly (and on top of that, bored her to tears!). She wanted to change, but she didn't have the first idea where to start or what she wanted. All she knew was that she was profoundly unhappy and unsatisfied. Finally, she started freewriting in her journal for fifteen minutes a day. At first, her writing was just full of complaints and excuses. But then one day she struck upon her deepest issue: She was afraid she'd never live up to her potential. Ever since she'd dropped out of school, she'd been drifting through her life without a purpose. She continued to write in her journal until she came up with actual dreams and goals, as well as a plan for how to implement them. Work Realm Work low high You scored 2 on the work life scale. Your work life involves what you do to make money, as well as any aspirations you have for your current and/or future careers. Issues in your work life may be related to the actual work itself or to relationships you've formed with your boss or your co-workers. Your test responses reveal that your subconscious issues aren't affecting your work life very much. Those who got a higher score than you in this realm of life may be dissatisfied with their careers or may find that their work isn't as challenging or interesting as they'd like. They possibly feel drained by the day-to-day demands of their job. This may be because things aren't going as well at work as they'd expected, and their subconscious mind is struggling to figure out the next step they should take. For some reason, some aspect of their work lives is preoccupying their subconscious, though they may find that consciously they're reluctant to think or talk about the problem. Your subconscious, on the other hand, seems content in regard to this realm of your life. For many of us, work is a realm that can bring up lots of issues around performance and this is stressful because work is where we also make the money that keeps ourselves and our families cared for. Irene, for instance, was having a hard time at work. She constantly felt distracted, making it hard for her to keep her deadlines. Her workplace was pretty competitive, and rather than rising to the occasion she felt like she was just slipping further and further behind. Her boss had spoken to her several times about her performance, but she insisted that she could handle all of her projects, even though she knew she was sinking more than swimming. She was getting so anxious that she couldn't sleep through the night, which in turn made it even harder to concentrate in the morning. She knew that her job was stressful, and that her work environment wasn't the most supportive, but there seemed to be something more than that going on. To find out, Irene started journaling each time she got stuck at work. After ten minutes of freewriting, she was often able to clear her mind and get back to work. One of the issues that she stumbled upon during this practice was her fear of rejection. She already knew she was a shy person, but her journaling helped her to see how her fear of rejection was giving her boss and her co-workers too much power over her state of mind. She tried to refocus her energy on doing what she thought was her best, rather than on trying to please them and prevent them from rejecting her. Friendship Realm Friendships low high You scored 1 on the friendship scale. Your friendships are the platonic relationships you have with people of your choosing. Healthy friendships offer us love and support outside of that which we get from family, romantic partnerships, and our sexual partners. Your test results indicate that your friendships aren't draining very much of your subconscious energy. Those who score higher in this realm tend to feel dissatisfied with their current circle of friends, perhaps because they have differing interests. Some may be in arguments with their closer friends, or some may simply be longing for more fulfilling connections throughout their social lives. Whatever the exact circumstances, their subconscious minds are picking up on some trouble in their friendship realm, whereas yours seems content. We are social beings and so we typically find it important to nurture and maintain friendships, but sometimes that's easier said than done. For instance, Catrina had just moved to a new city for work, and she didn't know anyone in town. She'd thought she'd be able to meet new people easily since there seemed to be so many her age in her office. But when no one reached out to her during her first week on the job, she started to pull herself inward. She told herself she was focusing on her job, which was demanding and new. But at night, Catrina found that she had terrible nightmares about strangers calling her names and chasing her down the street. The dreams got increasingly distressful until she finally decided to try some dream analysis techniques. Catrina eventually realized that she was experiencing an immobilizing fear of rejection. She could begin to see the pattern so clearly: The more afraid she became, the more closed off to people she became; the more closed off she became, the more her co-workers avoided her. Finally, she had to face her fears by inviting her co-workers out to lunch and starting to make herself more available. It was scary at first, but over time she started to make some friends, and a lot of her fears dissipated. Family Realm Family low high You scored 1 on the family life scale. This realm concerns the people you rely on most on a daily basis or in difficult times. This could be your family of origin — your parents — or your adult family, including your partner and/or your children. Your relatively low score in this realm indicates that your family life is not taking up too much of your subconscious energy. For those who are preoccupied with family, there is often a problem that's causing anxiety. Also, some people feel their family life is less than satisfying, or they worry a lot about their families. These concerns take up a lot of energy, and this can cause unconscious stress. It seems, however, that you feel pretty good about your family life. Though we typically depend on our families for love and support, certain circumstances can make our Family lives difficult. For example, Tara works full-time and has a partner and two children. All of these things are very important to her. Whenever she was at work, however, she felt distracted and mildly anxious. This was hard to understand since everything there was going smoothly and she was happy with her job. In addition, she slept poorly at night, but she couldn't figure out what was wrong. A friend suggested that Tara begin freewriting — anything that came to mind she should put down on the page. Through this activity, Tara identified her unconscious issue of not being good enough. While this issue impacted many areas of Tara's life, she was particularly worried that she wasn't being a good enough mom or spouse. This fear was causing Tara to feel drained, which made her less present when she came home from work. Initially, she thought she was simply tired from work, which then made her more fearful that she was neglecting her family. Once she was able to resolve these fears, she found that she actually had much more energy for her family at the end of her day. What's on your subconscious mind Your subconscious take Issues impacting your subconscious Mysteries of the subconscious mind Tapping into your subconscious History behind the test Further reading All of us live with core issues that impact the way we think and feel. Because many of those issues are subconscious, we may never have had the opportunity to address them. If we were more conscious of them we could begin to heal old wounds and free up our minds for more productive and nurturing beliefs. Tickle has analyzed your responses and determined how strongly these five core issues resonate with you. The higher your score, the more likely it is that the issue is having an impact on your life. Do you ever feel inadequate? Your subconscious is moderately preoccupied with feeling you're not good enough. Typically, feeling inadequate stems from feelings of shame and difficulties with self-confidence. Identifying the origin of this issue with the help of freewriting, self-hypnosis, or dream analysis (see explanation of techniques below) is a good first step toward alleviating these feelings. Do you ever worry that you're not doing your best? Your subconscious is moderately preoccupied with issues about your potential. People who score high on this issue may be suffering from unrealistic expectations about themselves, or they may be afraid to go for what they really want. Freewriting — one of the techniques discussed later in your report — can help you discover how this issue is holding you back and help you to identify realistic and attainable goals. Do you ever feel distrusting? Your subconscious is moderately preoccupied with issues of trust. People who are wary of others, can typically trace their distrust back to times or situations in which they were betrayed by friends or loved ones. Dream analysis is a good way to analyze this issue and discover exactly why we're afraid of trusting others. Are you afraid of being rejected? Your subconscious is moderately preoccupied with rejection. Typically, this issue is exacerbated when you take too much stock in the opinions others have about you. Building self-esteem and nurturing yourself can take some of the intensity out of this fear. Do you ever wish you didn't make things so complicated? Your subconscious is moderately preoccupied with feeling you make things more complicated than you need to. The next time an area of your life feels like one big ordeal, try freewriting about the issue; write down all of your feelings and fears. Once you've got it all down, try to prioritize the issues and select one or two of the most pressing, and then just address those to start. What's on your subconscious mind Your subconscious take Issues impacting your subconscious Mysteries of the subconscious mind Tapping into your subconscious History behind the test Further reading Because your subconscious mind is difficult to access directly though your conscious mind, it's difficult to know for certain what's going on in the deepest recesses of your psyche. Sometimes, though, the subconscious speaks up and makes a brief appearance in your conscious awareness. Once you learn to notice these intrusions of the subconscious, you can use this information to help you make decisions in your conscious mind. Did I say that? Have you ever meant to say one thing, but then said something else entirely? When you call someone by the wrong name, for instance, is that just a mistake, or is it actually a call from your subconscious mind? Many dub these errors in speech and writing "Freudian slips" as Sigmund Freud used them to gain insight into information he believed his patient was repressing. Consider that your accidents may actually be a moment of insight into your most concealed, conflicting desires. Write the incident down next time it happens and give some thought to what it might mean. Have a hunch? Sometimes you get a "gut" feeling about a person or situation. Maybe you think you're applying for the job you've always wanted, but once it's offered to you, you sense that something's not right about the situation. Some believe this intuition comes from your subconscious mind, which is a storehouse of valuable information, not all of which your conscious mind has access to. Learning to quiet your mind and trust your intuition is one of ways you can gain a deeper connection to your subconscious wisdom. Subliminal messages These are considered any information you absorb below a certain level of conscious awareness. While researchers differ in their opinions about the effectiveness of subliminal messages, many studies indicate that there are potential benefits to incorporating information into your subconscious minds. For instance, some studies have shown that exposing patients to anti-smoking subliminal messages during elective surgery have helped a good number of patients reduce or quit their smoking habits by the one-month post-surgical appointment. By introducing the appropriate subliminal messages, the powerful subconscious mind can influence the conscious mind to respond positively.