I just want to say I love you, I would give my life and soul for you. I have died for you...this is my life unraveled. This is my story.
I spent endless nights, pondering about my future. Why, I do not know. With every ounce of power I had, I tried to stop but couldn't. I saw myself happy and in love. I felt an overwhelming feeling of bliss. I saw children playing in the front yard, dogs barking at the back door. Vivid sights of things to come. I believed that with all my heart. At first I thought it was just a dream, but then, you walked into my life. As soon as I saw you, my heart stopped and my legs went weak. I had seen you in vision. You were that blissful feeling that overwhelmed me.
I walked over to you and stared, speechlessly. You were dating one of my old friends, who I hadn't seen for a while. He introduced us. I didn't know what to say. So I just said hello, and shook your hand. Then I made up and excuse and left. Later that night I started thinking about you. I said to myself that it was just a fluke, and maybe you just looked like her. Then I fell asleep and had a dream so vivid, so real, I awoke in sweat.
I was driving home, to see you. My car glided into the the garage, and I stepped out. You appeared out of no where and gave me a hug and told me you loved me. We walked into the house and laid on the couch together. The tv was off, and there was no sound to distract us. We just laid there, holding each other. Then a voice said softly in my ear, "This is what true love feels like." I got up to get us a drink, and when I came back. You were gone. Then the voice came back, "Ruin it and this is what will happen.", I dropped the cups, and called your name. I heard a crash coming from the front door. I ran. Fire erupted from the door, an as quickly as I ran, the flames spread. I turned around and saw you, standing in the fire, holding out your hand. When I reached my hand out to grab you, the room got bigger and you got further away. I ran to you, screaming your name, but as I ran closer to you. You got even further away. Until the flames engulfed me. Taking everything I thought was real away.
I awoke, and looked around, you were not there. Then I realized that it had all been a dream. Yet my room smelled of ash. I looked at the clock and saw how early it was, but I was too shook up to go back to sleep. So I staid up until I had to leave.
After a few months, I had forgotten about the dream, and I had barely seen you since we met. I had gotten a girlfriend, and we were happy for the time being, but there was no love in our relationship. It was strictly because we felt as though we needed someone to be with. That relationship only lasted a short while, because she had met someone she actually fell in love with. She married him a few years later. Before she left me, she told me that I would find someone that would love me as much as I would them, and that she could be right around the corner. She walked away from me and I walked away from her, and turned the corner. As fate would have it, you were around that corner. I thought about saying hello, but I wasn't feeling to happy.
During the next few months, we would met up every now and then. The dream had been forgotten gotten by that time. Until the last few months of summer, when we went to a party. At first, I thought we could be nothing more than friends. Then I got to see a side of you that I had never seen before. A side that made me fall for you. It was a feeling like not other. I felt a pain in my chest that sent shivers down my spine, a cringe in my stomach, and I got light headed. Then someone at the party, had said something that sparked my memory about the dream. I had remembered every part of it, and I got nervous and left the party.
After that day, I thought about asking you out, but I wanted to find out if you still had a boyfriend. I didn't want to just ask you, because I didn't want an awkward feeling between us if you did. So I asked around. I had asked your best friend at the time, and she told me you had just gotten a new boyfriend a few weeks ago. When she asked why I wanted to know, I told her one of my friends wanted to know.
After finding that out, I kept quite for a long while. Until we went over to your cousin's new apartment. You were talking to your cousin and I was talking to his girlfriend, who also happened to be your best friend. She was asking me how come I didn't have a girlfriend, because every time she saw me I was alone, writing. I told her that I was looking for a certain person, then I turned my attention over to you and your cousin, just out of curiosity. She noticed that and smacked me on my shoulder. She said, "Wait a second. When you asked me if she had a boyfriend, it wasn't for a friend. It was for you." I laughed and told her the truth. She asked me why I like you and I told her. Then a few minutes passed and we all started talking to each other, and she pulled you to the side. I talked to your cousin and we were wondering what you two were talking about. I looked over and saw you glance over at me, then I got an idea about your conversation.
During our visit, and after your talk, I didn't noticed a change in your character around me. Only in your eyes. They seemed to be more relaxed, yet a little different in color. The vibe I felt from you was still a little odd, I couldn't describe it. Later on, your friend started getting a backache and asked your cousin to rub it for her, but he didn't feel like it. So I told her I would, and she walked over to me and I messaged it for her. Then after I was done with her back, you asked me to rub yours. I couldn't say no. You laid down so that it would be easier on me, and I massaged your back. My hands were aching from the first one, but I just kept going.
As my hands moved around your back, I kept getting flash backs from that dream. Flashbacks from the bad part of it. A slight feel of rage came over me and a darker side of me came forth. It wasn't a side to be afraid of, it was a side the was more free with thoughts. I told you how I felt about you, leaving out the dream. You told me you didn't have the same feelings for me, but something told me that you were not honest about that. So I pushed you into showing the truth. I pride into your thoughts and found out you did, just you didn't want to say that you did. I remembered that I had to leave town the next day so I walked you home and then went home to pack.
It took us another few months to get back in touch with each other, but when we did, I didn't want there to be anymore monthly breaks interfering with our friendship. I wanted to stop those bi-monthly visits. So I stopped leaving town. I put all my time on my home life. I staid home and took care of my mother and pets. I made time for you and you made time for me, even though you had a boyfriend. I still think this is funny, I felt like the other man.
We spent the next few years together, becoming very close friends. Even after you broke up with your boyfriend. After that day, a few weeks later, I told you how I truly felt about you. You told me that you still didn't feel up to having a boyfriend. I understood your thought, till you said, "But don't let that stop you.", with a little devilish grin.
After about three weeks, I felt the uncontrollable urge to ask you out. I took you to the park, to see a few friends. Then we all laid down on the grass, to look at the stars, I asked you. You gave me a look as if I had waited to long to ask. Then you rolled your eyes, and laid your head against my chest. You said you didn't know, that you were unsure. I told you to think about it for a while, and to think about all the good times we had together. You said nothing, you just stared at the stars. I didn't want to make you feel pressured, so I looked at them too. After a few minutes, you crept closer to my ear and whispered, "Tomorrow night, meet me here at ten. An I'll have your answer."
The next night I sat at home waiting for ten, by reading a book. Then an hour before we were suppose to meet up, you called. You told me to bring your book back, that you had left over. I told you I would, and that I was almost done with it anyway. After we hung up, I got another call. I said hello, but no one spoke, so I hung up. I looked at the caller ID and the number was familiar, but the mane wasn't. I thought about it for a while, then noticed that I had to leave.
I was half way there and I noticed that I was being followed. So I tried to lose the guy, but he was to close. I turned around and looked at him. He moved away too quick to get a good look at him, but I caught a glimpse. He looked familiar as well. I continued to walk to the park. Taking a slightly different way, just be sure I wasn't followed.
When I got there, you were not. I looked at my watch and I was fifteen minutes early, but the guy behind me was right on time. It was the guy that followed me. As soon as I saw his face, I knew who he was and I realized who's number that was on my phone. It was you Ex. I tried to ask him why was he following me, but he cut me off with the pistol he pulled out of his pocket. He told me that I stole the only thing that brought peace into his world. He wouldn't let me say a single word. Every time, he put the gun closer to my chest.
After a couple minutes of him telling me how I screwed up his life and how he hated me, a tree branch snapped. It startled him and he pulled the trigger. You had walked over the tree branch, that startled him. You fell to the ground, in fright, and he ran off. You looked up and saw me laying there and you rushed to my side. You held my head on your lap, and hugged my face. Tears streaming down your face. I couldn't bare to see you cry, and I rolled my head to the side and I saw your book. Covered in my blood.
Now your book is my story. My life has stained the pages. An as the last bit of life drains out of my body, I wanted you to know. I love you and I have died for you. This is my life unraveled on a book you can never read.
