Somebody stole my potato.
This makes me sad.
It was a happy slice off of the end of a regular spud.
I noticed, right before i was chopping into it "Hey! that looks like a happy face!"
I immediately called Shane's attention to it, and then Dustin's.
"What do you see when you look at this potato? I queried
"A Happy face." Shane replied.
Dustin nodded.
"Wicked coooool!" I hummed with glee.
I had decided that it was my lucky spud. I considered framing it in a shadow box and praying before it each day...I could see myself years down the line, blessed with umpteen good Karma (Thanks to my Lucky spud of course) and Getting it's smiling happy face tattooed on my left shoulder blade.
It made me happy to think of Dustin staring into it's beady eyes when we humped sometimes...
But alas. That was just a quick peek into a future not to be.
I soon discovered that when you turned the potatoe piece upside down, it glared at me. With a frown and pursed lips.
I squeeked with happiness.
"It's a too-fer!" I exclaimed, and immediately quizzed everyone who came into my house that day...(And the next) "What do you see when you look at this potato?"
After the initial crazy look, (that to be honest dear readers, I am used to getting....um...often) The people I asked would humor me.
Yes.
Humor me they may have...but see the happy face they ALL did.
Only 50 percent saw the sad face. Whatever. Only true genius, as i explained to Shane,...can see BOTH faces of the lucky spud.
I considered then the tool that I had in my hand. Hmmmm. This COULD tell me if people were super smart or not.
Shake your heads if you must... Laugh...go ahead...but wait...
A neighbor came a-knocking the other day. He wanted to use the manuel for my Van.
"Hmmmm." I pondered "Will you bring it back and not steal it away forever?"
"Of course!" He answered, looking insulted.
I pulled out the potato..."what do you see when you look at my spud?"
He looked. "A happy face!"
I nodded...and turned it around. "And now what do you see?"
"Hmmm...kinda a sad face."
"You are wise, " I nodded And handed him my manuel.
I scared him, I know it. Shane laughed and exclaimed from his video game chair.."MA! You should sell that thing on Ebay! People will buy it!"
"NEVEAHHH!" I shrieked
Tonight I was chopping potatoes for dinner. I make the best fried taters ever, ask dawn...anyways. I was randomly searching out potato ends..when all of a sudden..I GASPED.
"Where's my potato!"
I looked up down and all around...and despite the fact that I've told my children to do that for 13 years...it didn't help.
My spud was gone.
Thrown away by myself maybe, when my mind was elsewhere....
Stolen by a jelous neighbor who wanted the power of the tater for himself...
We shall never know....
(Okay..It was probably me. I do get scatterbrained sometimes)
I like to think that a homeless man will be digging in my garbage next week, looking for recyclebles...and come across Ted the tater.
Perhaps.
